Problem to focus while reading, because you think about another book

Submitted by Underwud94 t3_11xhgm2 in books

I believe this is a problem a lot of us have. I never heard a person speaking about it, but it is something I have to deal with, and I believe I am not the only one.

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This era we are living in, where information is available to us just in a few clicks, can overload our minds sometimes, and in my case (I will speak for myself now), fill it with a lot of books I would like to read, create one huge list in my head, which makes it difficult for me to focus.

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It creates the obsession, that I have to reading that many books, and the feeling of great achievement when I finish one. I often find myself in great excitement when I am close to finishing a book. An excitement that begins to cloud the satisfaction of the reading itself - ''Perfect, one more book is down from the list, I'll be able to switch to another one soon...'' (for example).

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That feeling of treating reading books like it's some kind of sport, where you have goals, really bothers me. I want to be relaxed, and not think about it that way, but somehow my mind changed, and I feel like I got a disease I cannot get rid of. I miss the time when I was younger and when I went to a bookstore, and I don't know the books. I buy them by looking at the cover, or the headline. Now when I go, I know everything about them, I know about writers... There is no mystery anymore. I miss that.

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I managed to reduce this bad habit in my mind by deleting the ''Goodreads'' account for example, by stopping following bookstores online, discounts, and reading the same books more than once... I wanted to exclude myself from that online world and to be only myself and books. It helped, but still, from time to time, I have those thoughts, which ruin the pleasure of reading to me.

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I am wondering if anyone else can find themselves in this, and what you do to make yourself more relaxed and ''zen'' when it comes to reading. I am aware that this sound like a snob is speaking, but I was just being honest. Maybe I am a snob, but I suppose, if I am aware of it, it's the first step of stop being one.

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InejandKaz t1_jd32wyq wrote

I got the same problem and i dont have any solution. I try to keep my tbr list as small as possible, which helps to not be too stressed but i still got the urge to read everything at once and knowing that i wont get through them in the next 2 years is dreadfull

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NailsNSaw t1_jd34nmw wrote

I often find myself in this situation too :( I try to get over it by purposefully buying books based on the synopsis, that I've never heard of, or which aren't discussed in mainstream circles - if only to preserve that sense of mystery, as you say. I'm not saying it's easy, especially with the whole need-to-check-off-the-mental-tbr thing, but it often works! I've found many books which I genuinely enjoy and love that way

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Choice_Mistake759 t1_jd3789n wrote

You are right about the competitiveness reading seems to be acquiring for many people (somebody here today is asking if reread books should "COUNT", count for what).

But I do not recognize a lot of things. I use goodreads a lot, just do not join nor ever click like on any "challenge" (just do not compare yourself to others), and I find it incredibly useful to research books I want to read, or get recommendations from friends. My time is finite, I do not mind taking risks, but if my reading was totally random I might lose out on things for sure I would like.

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I_Want_In_Too t1_jd3i1qk wrote

Here’s my faux answer. Cut out all the pages and combine both books as one. Then you can literally read them both at the same time.

📕
Page 1 - Page 1

Page 2 - Page 2

Page 3 - Page 3

Etc

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Awkward-Following775 t1_jd3il1m wrote

Yes I struggle too, I have alot of unread books but I feel an anxiety when I dont buy more. Its the anxiety of not owning the book that clutters my mind just as well as their content.

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Procrastinator-89 t1_jd3kv9w wrote

Replying to Awkward-Following775 (#2,292,137)

First of all: reading books and buying books are two seperate hobbies ;).

But I feel the same struggle. I have piles of unread books, every once in a while I try to completely finish all books before I buy new ones. The least amount of unread books since 2008 I had was 16. Now I am around 50 or 60 or so. It’s a neverending story (which is also a great book haha).

I used to set my Goodreads goal way to high, so I wasn’t enjoying reading anymore, I just wanted to finish. I am actually rereading a lot of books from that period, because I never really enjoyed them.

Reading is weird, I want to read slow, so I can enjoy, but I also want to read faster cause there’s so many books I want to read.

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DLF4L t1_jd3o8uk wrote

Now I don’t know how to help with this problem but I can let you know what I do and maybe that’ll help. For context, I read about 100-400 books a year and almost always have 300-600 books on my tbr list. I am a huge mood reader and for me, my tbr list is just to make sure I have a list of books that could interest me at some point in my life. Now that could be years down the line or a day from now but there’s nothing worse than being in the mood to read a book and you don’t remember the name. Life’s too short to not read what you want in the moment and sometimes the books on my list don’t fit the current vibe. That’s okay. Books are amazing and if you aren’t totally invested in a book it’s okay to put it down, maybe read some synopsis of the rest of the story, and pick up a different one. It’s like there are tons of tv shows and movies but when I’m watching a good one I don’t think about the other good ones I’m missing out on I just focus on this one. You’ll never be able to consume everything but you can make the things you consume fit the person you are in the moment.

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sub-dural t1_jd3wa7t wrote

A good way to start is to do what you are doing - stop looking at book socials and goodreads. I usually have several books going at a time. At night I read something lighter to fall asleep. Books that I don't need to pay that much attention to. Then I usually have a book of short stories going as well as a "heavier" book. I've done this forever - there are so many books I want to read, so it's just easier to satisfy that itch by reading multiple books at a time. Maybe try that?

If I have a pile of to-be-read books, I stay out of bookstores, unless it's a used one that I can find some weird stuff in.

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PicardTangoAlpha t1_jd4a7uz wrote

You can counter these negative feelings by deliberately re-reading passages, and the Table of Contents. When I really want to appreciate a work of non-fiction at least, I'll make sure to read everything; the prologue, forward and introduction, all the footnotes and end notes, the afterward, and even the Index. You can also take notes, pick some works from that book's own references if the topic is engaging, and looking for more alternatives by checking Amazon, archive.org, your library online, and other booksellers for more titles like it. The reviews can ba valuable too.

I have no idea what goodreads is for or why I would use it. Not going to change that either.

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slowmokomodo t1_jd55akl wrote

Two thoughts.... Find yourself before you dive into any kind commitment. Also, never even think about trying meth.

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Puzzled-Table-6431 t1_jd59qlf wrote

Youre cheating on a book with another book lol. Now seriously when i was to read 4 or 5 books at the same time i struggled too. Now its harder to focus even on one book.

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Ok_Fox_5633 t1_jd5tbyt wrote

What’s helped me is to stop buying books and use the library. I’m a time schedule to finish books so I can’t start a bunch. I usually just read two books at a time, one fiction and one non-fiction. It gives me a good variety at all times.

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signer-ink-beast t1_jd6gdqh wrote

I think this problem is extremely common and goes well beyond books. We have so much access to information and entertainment. The backlog can be so huge that it gives you anxiety. I struggled with this once I entered young adulthood and had the opportunity to learn how to... actually do things for fun and leisure. I had to start very slow. This included reading.

IIRC, I read an article where someone described the same sort of thing you are talking about. It was featured on Pocket, maybe a couple of years ago.

But what they said in their article helped me realize that it is just impossible and unrealistic to feasibly get to every single little thing on the backlog list, for anything. It focused on reading, but you can apply that to movies, TV, music, video games, etc. You name it, it likely fits.

What I remember is this: just pick whatever you want to read at that moment and read it. What you don't pick, you can always read another time. And if later you change your mind and don't want to read it, you are allowed to not read it. It's not going anywhere. If you change your mind again and do want to read it, that's fine too. Make peace with the idea of it being unfeasible to get to absolutely everything in your backlog, because it's likely impossibly long, and that there isn't a deadline to get through that. You can go at your own pace in any order you please.

And if there's so many choices that it's paralyzing, just pick anything and start reading, or whatever.

I'll have to see if I can find that article, if I remember to actually look later.

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Underwud94 OP t1_jd71p8v wrote

Replying to signer-ink-beast (#2,300,061)

If you can find the article, that would be great. I am very curious about what was said there.

To pick whatever you want to read at that moment is my approach. It helps, but still, there is a battle with thoughts sometimes.

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Underwud94 OP t1_jd73ild wrote

I am happy to see so many people sharing their thoughts about this subject. I didn't expect that when I wrote this post. But I am also sad because most of us have to deal with this problem. I would prefer that it doesn't exist. I think that readers, who are dealing with it, can find some solutions or techniques which are mentioned here very helpful.

As I said in my post, I managed somehow to reduce that bad habit of overthinking while reading a book.

Excluding myself from online databases helped. I already have a big database in my head, so there is no need to search for more. I still accept spontaneous recommendations, those are nice, but I don't search for anything new by myself.

I mostly stopped buying new books, and I read only the ones I have on my shelf (about 50 unread books). Sometimes I want to read a book I don't have, so I go and buy it. But I managed to keep that on a rare point. Before, it was happening more often.

Rereading helps.

I understand when you love something, you want more of it. You know there are so many books that you should read, and it's perfectly understandable why obsession comes on the way. But there is another side of the story, where you should accept that you cannot go through everything. That you should go easy, consume the art of writing slowly, and enjoy every drop of it. I want to live that story. I now feel like I am on the border, which is also progress, but I want to get my mind to that checkpoint where I will be cool and not obsessed.

And one more thing for the record. I don't read fast, I read slowly, and I often return and reread some passages. This bad habit I have doesn't prevent me to consume the writing how it's supposed to. It only destroys the touch of enjoyment when you're empty-headed and when you completely dive into the book. And I really miss that.

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