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1

Major-Dingus t1_jdfb8mg wrote

Now where am I going to store my extension cords?

4

gordo31 t1_jdfbatc wrote

And all because someone, somewhere did all those things.

149

themanofmichigan t1_jdfc0uz wrote

Is there one that says something about putting ones dick in the toaster in figures 1-16 ? Asking for a friend

7

ExoticMeatDealer t1_jdfcn24 wrote

I always wondered if I could triple toast the double toast in the oven.

5

Lunaey05 t1_jdfd50a wrote

You know, they put these on here because somebody at some point did these things.

1

3BagT t1_jdfd6mg wrote

Honestly, Figure 22 had never occurred to me but it seems like a pretty good idea. Might give that a try - thanks for the tip!

1

Main-Resort-609 t1_jdfdb4l wrote

I’m surprised there isn’t one telling you not to put it in the bath tub

16

J4MES101 t1_jdfekpu wrote

Anything about toasting in the bath?

1

skunkwoks t1_jdfj02y wrote

Phew, it’s ok to use in a bath!

2

Physical-East-7881 t1_jdfj6v3 wrote

Maybe if they list everything you shouldn't do you'll be left with all you can do

1

SEPTSLord t1_jdfk9mh wrote

Are there 18 other pictures of how not to use a toaster?

8

Shathus t1_jdflnhw wrote

This is like an intro to Resident Alien

1

charliesk9unit t1_jdflt9q wrote

I was expecting one with a picture of a bathtub in it.

2

nikogrande t1_jdfq3ig wrote

Where's the one that tells you not to put slime in it??

1

mmpdp t1_jdfrukm wrote

Why is there a rocket ship vibrator flying out of 14?

2

LiemAkatsuki t1_jdfslm7 wrote

Remind me of the Indian wife (in a Bollywood movie) who water washing his husband's laptop

1

anonyoudidnt t1_jdftg1c wrote

You'd be surprised the things I've seen my grad students do to cook food in their tiny joint kitchen. Fig 22 is the real risk here

1

tuseroni t1_jdftl2f wrote

Wait, DONT put the toaster in the toaster oven?

1

beatmaster808 t1_jdfvlon wrote

Dammit, I was going to make noodles on my toaster...

2

androshalforc1 t1_jdfx1c7 wrote

Replying to IsThataSexToy (#2,328,365)

to be fair we only see warnings 17, 18, 21, and 22.

or maybe they are labeled above so its 13, 14, 17, and 18

either way there are at least 18 warnings we don't see, 'don't mate with the toaster' could easily be one of them.

10

Complete_Barber_4467 t1_jdfyae2 wrote

I use the toaster to preheat my coffee mug, is that a problem? I'm not going to have a cold mug ruin my coffee

1

Fishfindr t1_jdfyufg wrote

So we have to assume of the tens of thousands of toasters sold at least 4 people used them wrong.

1

bjones0921 t1_jdg0fal wrote

I’ve been cleaning my toaster all wrong.

1

Capital-Home412 t1_jdg3n0l wrote

Ok, so if I can't put water directly in my toaster or place a pot on top of it, how's am I supposed to make my pasta?

1

noobpwner314 t1_jdg7lkv wrote

So I guess throwing it in water is ok since it’s not on here

1

theZoid42 t1_jdg8hou wrote

Fig 17 is confusing, I can’t store the toaster with its cable on top?

1

Intertubes9000 t1_jdgb1qa wrote

Where is the section that shows not to skydive while toasting? This is unacceptable!

1

Sethmeisterg t1_jdgb4iq wrote

Surprised there's no diagram of someone fucking the toaster and a big X over it.

1

AssholeThrowaway_ t1_jdgeqvj wrote

Instructions? These are demands. The x marks the task already completed. Can we see the next few incomplete pages?

1

Dreadlordstu t1_jdgfeen wrote

So i guess that means other than those things, everything else is cool?

1

fakeuserbot9000 t1_jdgfkok wrote

Wait, you’re not supposed to hose out your toaster daily???

1

Technoblade46363 t1_jdgg9ue wrote

Don’t put your toaster in the oven: No chance really? There is no other way I could learn that information!

1

Dukeflookem t1_jdgggi0 wrote

"Car manuals in the 1960's told you how to adjust the valve clearances, now they tell you not to drink the battery fluid."

1

DFuel t1_jdgim66 wrote

If you can't do these things, then what CAN you do!??

What a useless device...

1

Leading_Macaron2929 t1_jdgj9gh wrote

The heating elements on my toaster broke, so I put burning wood in the slots. Thank goodness that's not prohibited.

1

Exce55um t1_jdgjvln wrote

I don’t get Fig.17 what’s wrong to storage the toaster with the cable on the top? Provided it
is cold.

1

rangorn t1_jdgjx42 wrote

How many of these are there?

1

KoningSpookie t1_jdgkzzq wrote

You would be surprised how dumb people can be... and how greedy for insurance money they can be. Especially the last part.

1

Crazy_cant t1_jdgoa6f wrote

People put Tortola glue in there hair, if something stupid can be done it will be done

1

Horror_Bodybuilder36 t1_jdgu22t wrote

Replying to gordo31 (#2,326,904)

You’re asking but my MIL, who has early onset dementia has done Fig. 22.

We cook all her meals and she would warm them in the oven however after she almost burned the house down we disconnected her oven and got her a microwave. She struggled at first until we found one with very simple buttons and we found out that she was struggling after we caught her heating her evening meal in a pan on the toaster.

1

ghostdog688 t1_jdgvd6q wrote

What should be most frightening is that these things were tried often enough that manufacturer felt they had to tell people not to.

1

dazzypops t1_jdgviw4 wrote

Someone creating the manual had a quiet chuckle to themselves.

1

newbalancewearer t1_jdgz5y8 wrote

Appreciation to the amount of effort making lovely illustrations.

1

1aibohphobia1 t1_jdh2gyv wrote

let me guess, these are the instructions for us americans? xD

1

All-Fired-Up91 t1_jdh4hnb wrote

Hmm yes please do not cook your toaster in a bigger toaster

1

Conranoss t1_jdh5641 wrote

I love warning labels like this. I used to frequent a gas station that had a sign stating to point the nozzle away from your face while refueling

1

Rreizero t1_jdhcffs wrote

Never underestimate the power of stupid

1

double-happiness t1_jdhdkvp wrote

Once when I had no gas I cooked with a pan placed on a sandwich toaster. True story.

1

dankazazel t1_jdho4mp wrote

You know when the business is old when the rules are long enough

1

delocx t1_jdhq3cg wrote

Replying to Lunaey05 (#2,327,093)

I have washed my toaster with water before. Granted, I had torn it apart to clean out all the crumbs and junk and was washing the non-electronic bits, and allowed it to dry for a day before reassembly.

1

Dorrono t1_jdi5u2e wrote

I get the feeling that for some years now, for every year passed, we remove one IQ point from humanity

1

sir-diesalot t1_jdibzmd wrote

Well they missed out turning it on it’s side and trying to do a cheese toaster in it, then burning the place down…

1

KennailandI t1_jdih6l1 wrote

AND you have to open the box to find out all these things that it’s no good for! You just know the regulators aren’t going to step in either and risk all money they’re getting from big toaster.

1

FM79SG t1_jdilk4y wrote

Dude I have seen Chinese aunties (old ladies) boil their underwear and socks in the water heater for tea.

People are can do the most fucked up things.

1

Its_Just_A_Typo t1_jdilw6s wrote

I am the grandson of Ukrainian immigrants; don't tell ME I can't cook soup on top of a toaster . . . . when I want some soup, dammit, I'ma have some soup.

1

capt-rix t1_jdipbk9 wrote

Don't store your toaster.

Don't wash your child's disastrous attempt at french toast out of your toaster.

Don't wash your toaster on the bottom rack.

Don't heat soup on your toaster.

1

gman51 t1_jdiwuzw wrote

Does that mean I can take it in the bath with me?

1

Zaro_ t1_jdj3d6d wrote

I've done fig. 18 before. It cleaned the toaster pretty well, then you just turn it on and let it dry itself

1

Snoo-35252 t1_jdj7lfd wrote

Instructions unclear

Penis stuck in toaster

1