Is it shallow to breakup someone over financial / career status? (I'm 31m , she is 30 f)

Submitted by Tessenreacts t3_11dwi4u in relationship_advice

I recently broke up with someone because she had limited career / professional ambition. I genuinely liked her, but she was bad with money and didn't really have ambition in terms of where she wanted to be career wise.

I asked a Facebook group for advice (I know major mistake), and was universally called narcissistic and shallow. That I expected her to "work full time, clean the house, and take care of the kids".

No I just want an equal intellectual and professionally.

Is breaking up with someone over something like this shallow?

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womp-womp-rats t1_jab8a0g wrote

This is an AITA post and will probably get removed. But: Breaking up with someone because you want a partner who is ambitious is not shallow. Seeking validation from idiots on Facebook is shallow.

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Clarka3 t1_jab8g5s wrote

100% not shallow, my guy. If there is such a big inequality that it causes you discomfort or resentment, then it wouldn't magically get better with time.

I dumped a girl I was crazy about because she had zero career ambition and the stress that came from the thoughts of me supporting the both of us and a future family on my salary alone was enough to scare me off.

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body_by_art t1_jab8s70 wrote

Well what would house work/ childcare look like?

Alot of men say they want a 50/50 relationship, but expect their partner to come home from work and take care of the kids, make dinner, wash the dishes, do some cleaning, pack theirs and the kids lunch, do the meal planning and do the grocery shopping, etc. Etc. While they just NEED a few bours after work to unwind

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Tessenreacts OP t1_jab97mf wrote

I would help with everything from cooking (I actually enjoy cooking) and cleaning, to anything else required / needed.

If she needs a day to unwind, I'll take over everything so she can relax and have some relax time. True teamwork.

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