You need to just buckle down and be independent as soon as you responsibly find the opportunity. You’re right, that no one is going to want to be around someone who gets reported as missing by overreacting guardians.

This is literally something that causes employers and recruiters to not call people back for job opportunities. As unfair as it is, they have an entire pool of candidates to choose from. Why would they willingly pick someone that, from their perspective, doesn’t seem like they have their life well enough put together that their parents/guardians have to make a fuss about it.

I’m not going to touch on the social aspects of it as, given your edit, you seem like you got a solid enough head on your shoulders. I will, however, emphasize the social/professional aspects of this.

You can feel however you want about whether or not your parents are or aren’t controlling, or whether or not they’re overstepping their bounds. However, as you just experienced, other people are going to have their say too. This is only the first time, and your grandparents have made it clear that they are going to do it again.

This is abusive behavior, and it will cause you to lose friendships, relationships, and professional opportunities, as your grandparents attempt to control your life through hyper vigilance and, potentially, outright lying to other people.

Ultimately, that’s what this boils down to. You grandparents lied to authorities in an attempt to control your life. Your mom, and you, aren’t people with lives and autonomy. You are possessions to be kept, protected, and displayed.

What happens when you turn 18? What happens when your college classes and responsibilities force you to stay out past what your grandparents consider acceptable? What happens when you’re applying for your first job, and you’re still living with them?

Heaven forbid, what happens after you move out, and your grandparents still have access to your information as a form of maintaining contact, but they instead use that to intrude upon your life wherever you go?

Will they call your job when you’re 25 and report you missing? Will they report your future fiancé for abducting you if you happen to go on a vacation to a place without cell phone service?

These might sound like exaggerations, but you just experienced 12 calls from the sheriff’s office, a call from your former high school, multiple calls from friends and family, and a bombardment of unknown numbers for not being home for 8 hours, and in spite of the fact that your grandparents could have literally just woken up your mom first to check.

I’m not saying “freak out”. I just want to emphasize that you’re making plans to go to college, and that is literally only going to make this problem worse, and it will likely continue getting worse until you make yourself independent, and likely cut off your grandparents, because they literally said they are going to make this an ever increasing problem for you once you turn 18, and beyond.

When people tell you who they are, listen.

Your grandparents plainly stated they are going to leverage at least this level of control over your life no matter how old you are.

This situation will very likely not get any better for you, and it’s going to be up to you to build a life for yourself while fighting against your grandparents’ efforts to control and possess you.