TIFU I shared my bonus details with a coworker who's getting significantly less

Submitted by Known_Figure_5198 t3_zhew9t in tifu

So today we just got our bonus numbers and my coworker asked me how much I got. The dumbass I am, I told her first. (I know, so stupid! but for my defense this is my second job out of school so I am not used to corporate America politics).

Thing is I expected mine to be slightly above hers so I figured no harm but as it turns out she's not getting anything at all which is code for "we're probably firing you soon".

For context I am getting 32k which I negotiated with the recruiter that gave me the offer.

Looking back, I think she's been doing bad at work (coming in late, limited knowledge of the basics) so I can see that they might fire her soon.

What's my exposure here? How do I handle this?

She doesn't strike me as the vindictive type but if she's getting fired soon then she has nothing to lose and could spread the rumor.

For additional context, we're both ~1 year out of college (I have ~7 month of exp more than her)

TL;DR: Shared my bonus comp with a soon to be disgruntled employee.

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zZbobmanZz t1_izlu1fz wrote

I don't know why you're acting like you did something wrong, you should discuss payment info with your coworkers. We can't fight inequality if we don't know it exists

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TheBestMePlausible t1_izm3h7u wrote

On the other hand, OP clearly feels like it’s a fuck up on his part, and the truth is his working relationship with this colleague will never again be comfortable.

If you’re wondering why they tell you not to tell your coworkers what you make, you are now reading one example of why they say that.

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zZbobmanZz t1_izmer7d wrote

Why would she be mad at OP? How does that put a strain on the relationship? It's good information to know, now she knows she might have to look for another job or change something

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TheBestMePlausible t1_izmfzuq wrote

It’s a human nature thing. Every time she looks at this guy, she’s going to think about that $20,000. It’s going to be awkward. I mean maybe not, you never know! Maybe she’ll take this as a learning moment and realize she should stop being late and put in more effort, look up to big bonus guy as a role model, it could happen. But odds are, awkward, at a minimum. Could get worse too, I’ve seen it happen.

People get jealous. It’s human nature. In an ideal world, sure, everyone would instantly unionize the minute they found out Sheryl at the register was getting two dollars an hour more than them. But that’s not what’s going to happen. It’s just going to make things weird now between you and Sheryl, who you used to like.

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RandoCalrissian11 t1_izncf7h wrote

It has nothing to do with inequality.

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zZbobmanZz t1_izoqmox wrote

If people aren't getting paid the same for the same job then yes it is inequality by definition

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RandoCalrissian11 t1_izp00jo wrote

Nobody does the same job, and pay isn’t tied to a position, it’s tied to the companies need.

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zZbobmanZz t1_izp3ltw wrote

You can say it all you want but that doesn't make it true, people can and do do the same job and pay is tied to positions, have you ever held a job in your life?

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RandoCalrissian11 t1_izpfkf7 wrote

Pay is not tied to position. You couldn’t be more wrong.

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zZbobmanZz t1_izpg7bs wrote

Lol, enjoy joining the workforce when you eventually do and find out that positions have specific pay rates and ranges.

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RandoCalrissian11 t1_izpgqhi wrote

It’s amazing how confidently wrong you are. The level of blissfully unaware is quite alarming really.

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AVG_MN_Man t1_izlvvv0 wrote

Spoken like a true Marxist...

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AcrobaticSource3 t1_izlxeom wrote

And you, u/AVG_MN_Man speak like a true capitalist who doesn’t mind shitting on workers as long as you get yours

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AVG_MN_Man t1_izlxp6l wrote

I am a capitalist, however that doesn't mean I'm for shitting on anyone... It's up to you to make sure you're wearing a raincoat when people are trying to shit on you...

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ooooooooooooolivia t1_izmiop0 wrote

Not a TIFU. This is a today your boss fucked up.

You don't have to do anything except point out that management decided not to give other coworkers the same bonus and everybody should fight to get what they deserve. In this situation, you don't have to be enemies at all, just say you feel bad and will help where you can to make sure everybody sees the unfair payment schemes

In the future, don't assume everybody makes the same amount, but do use that as a reason to know as much as possible about what they do make. It's the best way to stay competitive and know your worth. If you don't make as much as people who provide less, start looking for another job.

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KcocNoisnetxeGib t1_izlvt35 wrote

Call me old fashioned but I’ve nnnever shard my earrings/pay with anyone that wasn’t related to me or in a relationship with me. But it’s if it was an innocent admission, don’t feel bad, friend

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QuartzPigeon t1_izm0kk8 wrote

Yeah that's old fashioned, I'm genuinely curious what the reason is you wouldn't share with a coworker? I can't think of a downside.

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TheBestMePlausible t1_izm3pm1 wrote

You just read one. Chances are the two people in this post will never comfortably work together again. Every interaction they have from now on will be charged with this knowledge of the gap in payment levels.

Also note, he does give some valid reasons why the colleague is getting less money than him. I’m sure she doesn’t see it that way, but maybe everybody else in the room does.

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QuartzPigeon t1_izm48sf wrote

Found the boss lol. If I were her and doing a shit job I'd still want to know I'm making less, so I can better myself or look elsewhere. And if I was OP I wouldn't feel too bad, they're not the one paying her less. And feeling a bit awkward at work is hardly a good reason not to share.

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TheBestMePlausible t1_izm4yyc wrote

I was, in fact, a boss for about 14 years. Ran my own business, started with six employees, had 30 at the height of things, and ended with 10, most of them the same ones I started with. And yes, I went through a bunch of drama with this “people know each other’s salaries“ thing. There was nothing wrong with anybody’s salary, everyone was very well paid, well above average. The problem was that everybody’s salary wasn’t literally exactly the same. People got bent out of shape about it, even though everybody was getting a perfectly good salary, and the reasons for the differences in salary were totally fair and reasonable, basically being based around who had been working with me the longest, building things up from the beginning, and who were the new guys walking into a steady job with a steady salary.

It caused a lot of drama, and this post kind of reminded me of it. You can dismiss what I’m saying, but read the post.

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QuartzPigeon t1_izm5uwl wrote

I mean I don't know how bad this drama got but I still think it would be wrong to forbid employees from sharing that knowledge, and that it would be very strange to not share what I make if someone asked me as an employee, since I'm not the one that decided that salary or the salary of the person asking. People getting bent out of shape is their prerogative.

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TheBestMePlausible t1_izm6pmf wrote

I didn’t tell anyone they couldn’t share salaries, and at the time I would’ve felt exactly the same as you. I still do I guess, I certainly wouldn’t forbid someone from doing it.

But the drama involved one person quitting, trying to steal my business plan and customers, and failing after discovering all the things I brought to the equation that he simply didn’t have and couldn’t come up with. God that guy was a bitter, self centered asshole. They took another employee with them, who definitely didn’t get paid that good salary I offered for the next 10 years, unlike the four who stayed. But on top of those real world consequences, there was just a lot of venom and drama and bad vibes about it all between the various employees, when there was absolutely no call for it. Lasted like a year and a half, and the job went from super pleasant and fun to being kind of a pain in the ass for everyone that whole time.

Like, for an example- imagine if the colleague in OPs story above took it extra personal, and started sabotaging OP every chance she could. Now multiply that by everybody in the company knowing everybody else’s salary.

Again, I personally would never try to force someone who worked for me to not share this information. But doing so has consequences, and not just to the boss, but also to the people who share. I think it’s just a human nature thing to be honest, and that’s why it’s a bit of a tradition to keep your mouth shut about this stuff.

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QuartzPigeon t1_izmhulp wrote

That's fair, and you've made me think deeper about it. I would personally still choose to share, and I would hope my fellow employee would be smart enough to not take it out on me for no reason if they felt they were receiving a less than desirable amount.

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RandoCalrissian11 t1_iznct2x wrote

Here’s the real problem with sharing salary info. Employees act like toddlers most of the time. It causes unnecessary drama and bitterness. If one person thinks they do more work, but are paid less, they will usually start doing less, or not caring. The only way to remedy that is to fire and start over, another pain.

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TheBestMePlausible t1_izmjixn wrote

Oh great, I’m glad if I can contribute something helpful to the conversation! I think like a lot of things this topic is kind of gray area. In my experience, where it’s been OK, was when it was kind of a personal decision between two individuals who had a reason to want to share it, and hopefully know each other well enough to think they can probably handle the answer.

But you never really know, it might turn out to be a bad decision. I’ve certainly shared this info with close colleagues before, and sometimes it was useful. Sometimes it was asked and answered in light of upcoming salary negotiations, between two work buddies. But I’ve also seen that very same thing lead to really bad work conditions, with, like, constant bad vibes and sniping and factions and shit.

So, it’s not very common, you know? People just kind of shy away from it. And I don’t think that’s all because of some propaganda campaign by the bosses.

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KcocNoisnetxeGib t1_izntvoj wrote

ITS NONE OF THEIR FUCKING BUSINESS!! LMFAO. Sharing your personal business is for children…learn the hard way why this will bite you in the ass one day… fuckin reddit smh

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QuartzPigeon t1_izo2n4w wrote

Oh neat, I've always wondered how boots taste

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drdickemdown11 t1_izoh489 wrote

You literally said the other individual who thought it was a bad idea, gave you a deeper perspective on this..thus... but you're back to calling people boot lickers? I guess perspective is skin deep for you.

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QuartzPigeon t1_izohk8u wrote

Because from your all caps comment it's clear you have no deeper perspective on it, just "nunya business".

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KcocNoisnetxeGib t1_izpnrdl wrote

Yeah I’d check the thread again, slick

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drdickemdown11 t1_izr92tj wrote

You do understand that I was responding quartz, slick willie

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KcocNoisnetxeGib t1_izra0qk wrote

I’ve already got my dick sucked and then daytime drunk at the beach with my neighbors since then…move it along, dr

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ThisKiwiKid t1_izm2sv2 wrote

Because they fear their boss will find out and they’ll be punished even though it’s protected by law

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qndel t1_izncd9q wrote

Have you ever thought not everyone is from 'murica and might have different laws? Probably not ...

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