I am a mother and my daughter is 18. When she was your age we had a real hard time. She was really rebellious and was doing really dangerous things. It worried me and I was constantly triggered because she was also extremely anorexic from the ages of 13-15. I have a lot of ptsd caused by that time period for us. I made a lot of mistakes during that time that probably made her worse. Like telling her she “just needed to eat” when she was starving herself which is one of the absolute worst things you could say to a person with anorexia I later learned.

I try the best I can, but truth is parents have to learn a lot as we go. Parents are considered the “teachers” but tbh we learn more from you kids. We learn how to live with our hearts outside our bodies (that’s you our kids) and sometimes it’s really hard for us. Some of us are more graceful than others but I am a single mom and I work a lot so I’ve been guilty of having alot of worries in my head my kids don’t always know but probably feel.

Another story is I was driving in the storms a few weeks ago because I had to travel for work. It was a road trip with one of my girl friends of 25+ years. My mom called me on Bluetooth and started borderline yelling at me anxiously telling me not to go because she was concerned about me driving in the rain. I thanked her for guidance and told her I loved her and got off the phone. It was quiet for a minute. Then my friend sitting in passenger said to me “good job not listening to your mom all these years” we both started laughing.

Remember that even though you are a kid and your mothers child you have your own wisdom and truth. There’s alot of “noise” out there learn to tune it out. Sometimes that noise can taint us, make a practice of safeguarding and protecting your energy & your peace. This isn’t always comfortable but be ok with discomfort and you will grow! And you will change and adapt and be better!

Sometimes we need to create a boundary with people we love. Doesn’t mean they are bad just means it’s not for us and that’s ok.

Happy birthday dear! You’ll be alright :)