I understand OP, not too long ago I was in similar shoes so here is some wisdom I picked up along the way.

First and foremost, Action is the antidote to anxiety. The action doesn’t matter, whatever you choose helps/works to some degree no matter how easy or how hard. Getting out of your comfort zone is key for change, our comfort zones got us to where we are.

Leisure time indeed is a great thing, but it’s got to be in some balance between action and rest. If you are using leisure time in place of anything YOU think should or needs to be done (unimportant or important doesn’t matter), you likely will feel that slow growing guilt type feeling which #1 ruins/takes away a lot of the actual leisure out of the leisure time #2 puts you in worse of a mood than normal which in turn negatively changes your perspective of everything you see while in that mood/feeling to be through a little more of a pessimistic lens. How could it possibly ever help anyone to perceive their own reality more negatively than just our normal perspective, let alone our optimistic self?

WE SUFFER MORE IN OUR OWN IMAGINATION THAN IN REALITY.

TALK TO YOURSELF THE WAY YOU WOULD TALK TO YOUR BEST FRIEND. Negative self thoughts/talk does a lot more harm than good. Don’t disadvantage yourself.

YOUR own perspective is everything, NO ONE ELSE’s should contribute to your happiness or unhappiness. There is no life time stamp YOU have to get anything done regardless of what societal norm seems to you. It’s your life, live it on your own terms.

ABSOLUTELY NOBODY IS COMING TO SAVE US AND DO ALL OF OUR HARD WORK FOR US. If we don’t do our own shit, nothing will ever get done. There’s not a superhero or regular human that’s coming to solve your problems, tear down your roadblocks, or take your burdens off of you. So truly the best way to look at it, is do it now or do it later. You choose, just know that usually do it later is more stressful.

LIFE IS A CRUEL TASK MASTER, TASKS WILL NEVER STOP COMING AND YOU NEVER WILL FINISH. This is shitty to know at first, but life is ever changing n at some point come to the realization that you knowing this in itself truly can be used as a good thing. First glance at that line seems stressful, yet at the same time it’s a great way to distress also.

More than likely numbing yourself is contributing to the slow progress of the problem over time. We have feelings for a reason, and we are indeed suppose to feel them. When we numbing in any form, we are blocking out what we should be feeling, which delays the progress. Without numbing yourself, those feelings become so strong THAT YOU ACTUALLY GET SICK ENOUGH TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! Numbing delays only yourself from getting what you want. DREAM BIG because truly there isn’t anything out there that cannot be accomplished. With long term consistency and a daily grind, over time that produces very LARGE and unbelievable results. Nothing is off the table.

We are the superior species on this planet, and we are the ONLY SPECIES THAT HAVE THE ABILITY TO THINK ABOUT THINKING! That alone is some powerful information if you dwell on it. Positive thoughts are key because every word out of your mouth or physical action you do all starts with a thought. Thoughts become words. Words become behaviors. Behaviors become habits. Habits over time shape your life outcomes. YOU CAN STEER YOUR OUTCOMES in a direction that FAVORS you through long term consistency of positive habits. Nothing worthwhile happens quickly, just understand that this does take time, and trust your daily process. The day you plant the seed is not the day you eat the fruit. However, no fruit can ever be eaten if ya never plant the seed .