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FlamingoWalrus89 t1_j9sw0ct wrote

LPT: Never assume people want or don't want kids. Also, people can be really put off when asked to give a glimpse into their home life, so don't ask anything about their current home situation (including pets). Ask broader questions when first meeting them. "Have you always lived around here? What do you do for fun? Seen any good shows lately?".

Asking about pets forces the person to share facts about their personal life, or risk looking like an asshole for choosing not to (because pets seem so harmless, and mostly are, but also deeply personal).

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sickofbasil t1_j9xm1jx wrote

I agree wholeheartedly with not assuming what people want re kids.... But I really disagree with not asking people about their lives. Any question can be off-putting to the wrong person, but chitchat is how humans meet and get to know other humans. It is a normal and healthy way to bond and build trust. If you're uncomfortable discussing basic things, then you either need to learn to politely say "I'm not comfortable talking about that" or stop meeting new people.

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FlamingoWalrus89 t1_j9y56fg wrote

You're right. I was viewing this post entirely from a professional lens, and I didn't even realize it until now. That's actually kind of disturbing that my brain basically forgot that humans can meet other humans for purposes other than building a professional relationship (fuck, I need a vacation).

You're 100% right and my comments look pretty ridiculous now lol.

Edit: I've done a few work trips lately and always enjoy chit-chating with people I meet at the airport or in the plane. But this is all just friendly small talk, not the foundation of a new friendship. My mind went to all the new people I've met, and all were clients, colleagues, vendors, or these fleeting moments with another passenger on a trip. Still, it's sad that my mind went to these examples only. But, with those kinds of interactions in mind, I think my opinion still stands.

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Informal_Ad3771 t1_j9szc5n wrote

They may not have the disposable income for shows, or they might be homeless. No reason to shame people for that.

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