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mauricioszabo t1_je04pdr wrote

>Those last few lines were phenomenal my friend.

These... took way longer than the rest of the story. Actually, my first try was to make into a comedy, but then it didn't work out; second time, in the end I went to describe how the villain could see the hero voicing against minorities when he was not "on duty", but that got boring, and the history was almost over anyway; third, I tried to describe the destruction the villain would do, but that also got boring :D.

The one that almost made was if this world is not going to treat my son right, this world have no right to exist, but I though it would be out-of-character of the villain, and also it got a weird taste of "did he asked his son if he wanted the world to be destroyed?", so I decided against it; finally, I tried making him into a dictator, but there was no power on the last lines, and that's when I decided on this final version... which I feel could be better, but I am quite happy with the result :)

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McDuchess t1_je2xe38 wrote

It feels right. So very right, with the words being tossed about just today.

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