"Everyone get on the floor!" You sigh, taking one final sip of your drink before laying on the ground like everyone else. Crime was constant in the big city, and even small owned cafes were on criminals hit list, apparently.

Watching the scene unfold in front of you, you feel an urge to help. You knew you could change the outcome of this situation, save the day. But you also knew that without a license your win would be short lived. And with a nice pair of handcuffs, you would be going to jail with the criminals you had stopped.

You grimace a bit at your own thought as the man with the gun continues to yell at the poor barista. You notice his friends who were also carrying scary looking weapons didn't seem bothered by how much time that this robbery was taking.

You glare at them, wanting to wipe those smug looks off their faces. How dare they come in here thinking they could do whatever they wanted. You clench your fists, resisting the urge to use your powers.

You wanted to become a super hero, not a vigilante.

Ping

A notification breaks you from your thoughts as your phone goes off. Quickly glancing at it, you notice it's an email. Opening it up you start to frantically read, 'Dear Ha-' You skip past the honorifics, 'The Department of Heroism would like to thank you for you application to become a hero to help fight for justice and freedom.' Yes? 'We apologize for not returning to you about your application so soon.' Yes?! 'Our head committee went ahead and looked at your resume.' Yes?!! 'And we have decided to go with another candidate since "Omnikenisis" is to much of a liability for our legal team.'

You stop reading after that. Really? That's what they were worried about? Lawsuits?!
You groan, resting your head against the cold floor. What was wrong with your power? It had many good uses. As you grieve your loss the two criminals notice you distraught.

"What's the matter, boyfriend dump you or something?" "Naw bro, looking like that she'd be lucky to even get a catcall from some homeless dude." They snicker at their own joke. Forget a license and forget heroism, this was just plain unfair.

Getting up you brush yourself off, if you were going to wipe the floor with these dudes you weren't doing it covered in dust. Looking at the two now puzzled men you causally wave a hand out towards them.

"You know if it walks like a duck and talks like a duck it probably is one. But in your case you'd be better off as pigs."

Suddenly the two men shrink. There screams turn into squeals as both turn into miniature pigs. There counterpart sees this and starts firing rapidly at you,

"Fcking Btch!"

You quietly wave your hand again, making the bullets turn into bubbles. As they pop you see the man's face go into shock.

"You know I'm quite tired of your shenanigans, so why don't you just pop off already."

Snapping your fingers the man and the pigs suddenly vanish in a puff of black smoke. Sighing you hope you remembered the police stations address correctly, otherwise you teleported three criminals who knows where.

Ah, scratch that, one criminal and two pigs.

Smiling at your own joke you hear slow clapping behind you. Turning you see an older gentleman with what seems to be two very strong looking guards eyeing you.

"Very wonderful my dear, very wonderful indeed!"

"Who are you?"

"Those in the under city call me..."

You let the small man ramble, as a huge headache hits you.

"You know what, I don't care."

You wave you hand dismissively, and the three men disappear from your site.

Clenching your head, you ignore the stares and whispers from the other customers as you ask the barista,

"Can I get another latte please?"