"You really expect me to believe my dad would've made a deal with you?"

The demon grimaced as she replied, "Look, Debbie, I know you have reason to believe I'm lying here, but I'm not. And your old man's already twenty three years overdue, so I'm not in the mood, okay?"

I couldn't believe what I was hearing; the story of my dad building up a successful bakery from the day he came to the States was one of the most inspirational stories I'd ever heard. But it wasn't even real? He promised me to a demon just so his business would get off the ground?

I pushed the demon away from me and said, "I won't believe this. My father is an honest man--"

"Yeah, but he was also a desperate man. I mean, first generation immigrant in this shitshow of a nation? Odds were long his bakery would succeed without my help. Of course, I needed payment for the transaction."

I sighed. "Me. You needed me."

The demon nodded and continued, "I don't know how he managed to keep you out of my grasp for so long, but I am fucking over it. You're coming with me."

"No no no no, please don't! There has to be another deal we can make! I'm about to propose to my girlfri--" An idea popped into my head. "Excuse me, what's your name?"

"Nessa."

"Nessa, did my dad ever give exact parameters on what he'd be giving you to me for?"

Nessa groaned and responded, "No, the entire point of this deal was that you would be given to me for my own purp--" I cut Nessa off by whispering my idea into her ear. Nessa promptly went wide eyed. "Well, that's certainly... enticing."

SIX MONTHS LATER

The sound of rolling waves and the tropical breeze dancing through the trees outside stirred me from my sleep. As I yawned and took in the sight of the hotel room bathed in the light streaming through the gaps in the curtain, I felt something warm and soft press into my back as a voice whispered, "Hey, guess what? We're married!" I chuckled as I turned to face my wife Edith, with her giant monster of light brown hair spread out on the pillow. I rested my hand on Edith's cheek as I purred, "You are never gonna get tired of saying that, are you?"

Nessa rolled over to toss an arm over me and nuzzle into my chest. "Would you?"

I concede to her point with a shrug as Edith looked at Nessa with a gasp. "Oh my gosh, we're married too! As Edith peppered Nessa with many relentless kisses, I started tickling the latter's tummy, sending her falling onto the bed laughing so hard she was crying. In between gasps, Nessa looked at us with a smile and wheezed out, "You assholes."

Edith giggled as she rested her head on my midsection and said, "So, what're we doing today?"

"I had a couple things in mind," I replied as I opened the notes app on my phone. "There's a luau happening tonight at the lagoon, we could do that swan boat island tour they mentioned, there's the golf course--any of this sounding good to you two?"

Edith raised her hand. "If we do all three, could we go golfing first? The golf clubhouse is right next to that breakfast buffet and I really want some pancakes."

Nessa excitedly patted on my belly. "Yessss, pancakes! What time does it open?"

I checked the clock on my phone before answering, "About an hour from now. We should probably get moving."

Nessa let out an exaggerated groan and said, "Oh, very well. But first..." Nessa then kissed the both of us deeply, one after the other. "My daily tribute to the greatest deal any devil has ever made."