Brought infront of various alien species, of shapes and sizes I would’ve thought impossible, the one who brought me there- green in colour, and almost resembling of old paleo art, nudged me with it’s nose, toward beings that towered over me.

“An average specimen for your viewing. Juvenile, and with a few mental defects. Watch what it can do!”

Okay, that was offensive, and I would’ve much preferred not to have been given a translator, because that just felt mean. I was handed a pen and paper, with foreign eyes looking at me intently. It was a few high-school level equations. Algebra, too, which was my favourite kind of math, since it made sense to my visual learning kind of brain.

Thinking hard for a moment, and then repeating the processes I had been taught, I wrote down the answers to the questions, in very scratchy handwriting. Finishing relatively quickly once I got into a rhythm, I presented my basic algebra to these creatures that were advanced beyond my comprehension. I must’ve looked a bit nervous, because that green, dinosaur-like alien, gently nudged me with its nose again, as if to try to give me some support.

The galactic community infront of me looked positively stunned. And sure, I wasn’t the brightest at maths, but this was just basic algebra that would be taught to 15 year olds. Was it really so complex for them? Or perhaps it was because the average human intelligence wouldn’t compensate for such knowledge? Whatever it was, they seemed impressed.

“What a marvellous creature. And they’re all like this?” An amorphous blob questioned, hollow voice echoing through the spaceship halls. I was lifted up by a few littler blobs, who I assumed were helpers of the big one, but I wasn’t really sure. Well, it wasn’t relevant. I was pretty pleased, because I was getting attention I never would’ve gotten back on Earth.

Cooing and touching my hair, I felt wanted, whereas back home, I was merely berated for my poor test scores and my odd way of thinking.

“The rest of them are kind of mean.” I commented, and they all stared at me adoringly, not stunned by my use of language, aided by the translator, but seemingly by my voice. They spoke to me like normal humans, as if in normal conversation, but I could tell this, to them, was baby-speak, because they talked amongst themselves as if I wasn’t there, too, and their languages were too complex for the measly translator I had been loaned. Well, that was okay. This was nice, and I could get used to this kind of treatment.

(It’s not very good. Sorry about that. I just think that advanced aliens being so enamoured by humanity would be funny.)