“So, how in the name of our Pantheon did you fall in love with our nation’s patroness. Surely you didn’t seduce her.” The lawyer says with a smirk.

“Considering the fact that not one of your kids looks like you, I’ll pretend to answer: I haven’t the foggiest.” Gasps were made at my remark and the lawyer glared as his wife hid her- oh fuck it’s true! Shit! “It’s true! I have no idea! All I did was pray and-“ I snapped. “It happened! Don’t look at me, I didn’t even know it was happening!”

The judge rubbed his face as he considered all the implications. My crops did well. The rent on time, everything was good. I think.

“What did you pray for, sirrah?”

“I prayed for a pretty wife, good crops, and at least a prosperous life. That, and I’d offer up my life as pay-“ I paused. No- that wasn’t it. Ohhh boy. “I offered her my firstborn,” I rubbed my face.

“Oh my gods,” the judge sighed as everyone in the courtroom facepalmed. My wife was in the back holding our newborn son, blushing.

“Your marriage is valid, but please note that while you are entitled to divine spousal privileges- please do no get us all killed.” The judge warned. I gulped.