"So..."

She screams.

"Sorry, didn't mean to startle you."

"Why aren't you unconscious?"

I shrug as much as the bindings allow me. "Did you mess up the dosage?"

She stares at me for a second. I make a popping sound with my lips, looking around.

"I guess the candles and rope threw me off. Totally misread what was going on here, didn't I?"

"Big time. You are not my type. But she will love you." My date, who introduced herself as Tabitha but might have been lying about that as she did about everything else, points at a statue of a woman.

"I'm not a virgin, by the way."

"What are you talking about?"

I clear my throat. "If you need a virgin sacrifice. It won't work. I'm not a virgin."

She laughs. "I didn't think you were a virgin."

"Ok, that's great. Cause I'm not."

"Ok"

"Ok"

There's an awkward pause. The sound of a mortar fills the air for a couple seconds.

"She'll like you because you are a linguist, by the way." Tabitha is trying to make conversation. I appreciate it, it's not like I can do a lot while tied down, so at least we can talk. She continues. "You have no idea how hard it is to find someone in your field. No one puts it in their bio! What am I supposed to do?"

"You could have made a false work ad, couldn't you? Would have had the linguists coming to you."

"Oh." She leaves the mortar and looks at me. "Didn't thought of that."

"Kinda wish you did." I shrug again. We laugh. Our conversations usually went smoothly. We have a lot in common. Not everything, of course, but we have a similar sense of humor.

"Ok, seriously." I ask her. "What's in this for you?"

"Power, mostly. She gives boons to people that send her good sacrifices."

"Bullshit. How do you even know that?"

"Excuse me?" She puts her hands on her waist, cocking an eyebrow at me.

"Don't try to tell me you've done this before. You barely knocked me out and you've been stirring that mortar ever since I woke up. It's mush already, there's no point in stomping on it anymore. You are just trying to kill time while you re-read your ritual notes."

She blushes. "Not!"

"You have your phone right there. I can see it from over here."

She covers it with her hand.

"And what's that font size? Are you blind?"

"Yes, I am. I was wearing glasses our whole date!"

"Oh" I must admit, I don't remember that.

"Come on, dude, really?" I smile briefly, but she is not buying it. "Do you even remember what I'm wearing under this cloak?"

She spreads her arms. I think I see a glint of white in the hood. Was she wearing a white top? Jeans? I can't remember. She is waiting for an answer, I won't get out of this one.

"White top, flower pattern, jean shorts." Even to myself I don't sound convincing. She sighs and turns away.

"You are all the same."

"Oh, don't be like that! I have a lot in my mind right now."

We laugh again.

"Hey, last thing, I promise."

"Uh-hm" she doesn't turn back to me.

"Next time, do a better job on the knots."

She drops the mortar and phone, rushing over to check on my hands. They are still tied up tight, so ss she gets close, I headbutt her in the nose. She falls on her ass, bleeding, but gets up quickly.

"What was that?!"

"Not gonna lie, I was really hoping you'd pass out."

"That's not how any of this works!"

"Sorry, it's my first time headbutting someone into unconsciousness!"

She lifts her face and holds her nose with two fingers. Her voice sound messed up. "Who am I to complain, right? You should be unconscious too."

We laugh again, and she chokes a bit on the blood.

That's when the police knock down her door, guns blazing and what not. I would only learn a neighbor saw her dragging me in later. For now, I'm panicking and screaming as much as everyone else.

Tabitha doesn't put up much of a fight, mostly because I weakened her. A mustachioed officer unbinds me, and asks:

"Are you alright?"

"Not my worst date, stay off Tinder my dude."