If you were approaching Lolita expecting that it would be similar to “dark romance” that might be part of the disconnect. The point of Lolita is not the portrayal of “weird kinks” nor to show the central character as “misunderstood”. The point of the book is that it is narrated by a character who is trying to justify something that the other characters in the story, the readers and the writer find (rightly) abhorrent.

I would never suggest that people read Lolita if they are put off by the depiction of child abuse material or upset by it. If you don’t want to read content like that, then absolutely don’t. However, it does a tremendous disservice to the book to say that it’s on Humbert’s side.