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tomandshell t1_j1lcigu wrote

I went through that with my taste in movies after I fell in love and got married. My cynical and pessimistic edge really softened and I was able to experience sincerity in stories for the first time in a while.

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GhostNULL t1_j1mjfa1 wrote

Same but the other way around. Broke up with my ex and before that never was into romantic movies much, but since then I've watched "In the mood for love" more times than I'm willing to admit.

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kinky_boots t1_j1nidaz wrote

That is one of the most beautifully lush cinematic movies with an amazing score and the chemistry between Tony Leung and Maggie Cheung is incredibly palpable.

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sweetspringchild t1_j1mk3x0 wrote

There was research that showed people like confirmation that they're right, even if that confirmation comes in the form of songs. People who were already sad preferred sad song, angry ones agressive songs, in-love ones romantic songs etc.

I bet it's the same with books.

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ZootZootTesla t1_j1mlbru wrote

Self affirmation and self labelling theory.

If you believe to be sad you are attracted to sadness.

If you believe to be in love you are attracted to material around love.

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fapping_giraffe t1_j1mprzu wrote

Self affirmation is more about choosing and willing your life forward in every instant no matter how bad or good it is. It's about not giving into nihilism or despair and having courage to embrace all difficulty in the same way you do the positive things in life.

It's not about giving in or becoming the things you're attracted to

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ZootZootTesla t1_j1nt4ox wrote

Beautifully said, I'd think you'd agree that self affirmation will drive oneself in a direction of their choosing whether its real or not. As I understand it its about not only neutralisation of one's actions but the endorsement of them in the opinion it will improve there life truly or in a delusional manner.

Regardless I hope you've had a merry Christmas and have a happy new year.

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debsim t1_j1nv97v wrote

What if i love romantic songs but never really been in love? Maybe i’m in the love with the idea of romance?

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sweetspringchild t1_j1pog4b wrote

It's the general feeling that matches, I don't think neither music nor human emotions can neatly be packed into boxes.

Nobody is ever feeling just in love.

Or a romantic song could just sound optimistic and hopeful to you and you're optimistic and hopeful in that moment.

And of course what sounds romantic to one person might not to other.

It's not clear-cut, it's just a general trend they noticed.

But also you could have read a romantic book, and be in such mood even though it might not have happened to you personally.

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KatieCashew t1_j1ow1lz wrote

I watched Stardust at the exact right time for this. My now husband and I were falling in love and still in the honeymoon phase of our relationship. I could totally relate to the glowing feeling of being in love. I maintain that despite being fantasy that is one of the most accurate portrayals of being in love. It doesn't actually make you glow, but your sure feel like you are.

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