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daedelus23 t1_j6k9jx1 wrote

Reply to comment by chuckletits in The letters of T. S. Eliot to Emily Hale that were kept sealed from 1956 to 2020 have been released for free online by RunDNA

I didn’t read his statement as he “never loved her” more of he loved her at one time but had changed and realized he was in love with who she was, and who he was, back when he first fell in love with her. Can confirm this happens and it can be heartbreaking to realize and difficult to admit to one’s self.

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SeanyDay t1_j6ka0n7 wrote

One has to imagine this was more common before telephones and internet made it easier to remember the current version of a person vs the memory that was held on to

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piquedinhighschool t1_j6kfwjk wrote

Still remember when I was young, my family going to the same vacation spot and seeing my summer friends once a year. The changes between a full year are so much more pronounced, especially for growing kids. I guess at this point this experience is almost entirely gone now, with people uploading selfies daily. Would have been nice to have the internet then but I enjoyed that experience as well.

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dosedatwer t1_j6lwd6p wrote

Definitely happened to me at least three times in my life already. Remembering someone that used to exist for years after I've lost touch with them, only to realise the person I loved doesn't exist anymore. They changed.

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SeanyDay t1_j6mma58 wrote

You probably did too 😉

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MajesticMetaphor t1_j6o1rsi wrote

Also lust is very strong in the beginning of relationships. You begin to see more of people as that fades and sometimes it’s unsettling.

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