Jersey is nicer than Brooklyn. Some people would rather just say they live in Brooklyn though. Nightlife here is kinda meh so if you guys are big clubbers or anything I would choose Brooklyn, otherwise Downtown JC or Hoboken is your best bet.

Keep in mind, your friends will probably not visit you if you move to Jersey even though it’s closer than Brooklyn. A lot of people in NYC are allergic to New Jersey.

Transit:

I don’t really see any advantages that south Brooklyn has over Hudson county, except it’s probably on average less car dependent, but you really don’t need a car if you live near the LR or PATH. You will be closer to the city here than you will be there for certain. NJT buses to port authority are pretty solid. I think the ferry is kind of a rip off but some people like it and it’s dependable.

I think the PATH is far better than the NYC subway but there is debate on this subreddit whether that’s true. In my experience it’s more reliable for commuting. It’s certainly safer and cleaner than the NYC subway. Off hours the PATH doesn’t run very often.

Affordability: Most places near the PATH train have pretty much reached comparable prices to NYC, but the apartments are on average nicer, newer, and have more amenities. The monthly cost of an apartment is probably not going to be lower than one in Brooklyn, but when you factor in the quality of the apartment and commute times your money still goes further at the end of the day imo.

If you want something cheaper and are open to a more Suburban feel I would look at Yonkers/lower west Chester as well.