I was right there with my first. I could not produce enough and I tried so hard. I felt like such a crap mom pumping and nursing and pumping and nursing all the time just for him to not be fed. When I finally had to come to grips with my limitations and go to all formula all I could think about was how much I was failing him. I have two others that I also had to formula feed, but I knew that would be the case and after going through it the first time I was mentally prepared.

My oldest is 15 now. He's bright, healthy, hilarious, kind and we are genuinely close. Not in some weird way either, he is social and has plenty of friends. He tells me about his life, we hang out all the time, I mean we are bonded. I feel bad when other parents get so excited that their teen chose to hang out with them because that's my normal. All of my kids are the picture of health, and all of them are super close to me, which were my two biggest fears. They're more than just fine and yours will be too!

Also you aren't failing, you're doing everything you can and your baby is getting everything they need from you. In fact by seeing how much you care I know that you are killing the mom thing. Big hugs, I know how hard it is.