Comments

You must log in or register to comment.

22OregonJB t1_iwv1xot wrote

I am not really sure we needed neuroscientists and philosophers to understand that by comparing anything in your life to the edited personas of someone else’s life that is carefully crafted to look as good as possible for their “followers/friends” is not good for us.

Their lives are just as screwed up as the rest of us they are just better at hiding it. -David Goggins.

91

coyote-1 t1_iwv4sxz wrote

The other half of that equation is that folks don’t want to look at (that is, share with you) your problems. So you get little to no attention if you post your real life, and any attention you get from that is negative or cloying.

I vastly prefer the reddit model. Anon posting, I can share my thoughts without sharing my life. And I can learn the stuff I need or observe the stuff that entertains me, instead of having to fit in with the herd.

51

clairelecric t1_iwveqgx wrote

I agree. In which the whole point of the medium is also entirely different, and you get the support and relating irl. I have to say that reddit can be extraordinarily cruel and rude as well though. A bit like Twitter. The more anonymous people can be, the more uninhibited they are, which also means unthinking vileness unfortunately.

23

coyote-1 t1_iwvghwy wrote

Yeah that’s a hazard as there are no consequences. It’s unfortunate. Just remember that any such instances say everything about those making vile posts, and virtually nothing about the intended targets of those posts.

2

Small-Talent-For-War t1_iwz1inr wrote

There is a complementary discussion toward the idea of "representation" in the media. Diversity and representation in media is generally very good, but at the same time, it doesn't seem to be something that can be artificially or intentionally moderated. Our arts and media - stories, in general - are reflections or imitations of life, but the focus on the necessity or importance of representation in what are essentially various forms of fictions (even the news is in part often fictionalized to present a "story" - the people in the story become characters that likely are as unrecognizable to the actual people as a actor playing them in a TV movie would be).

However, the emphasis on representation seems to imply that real life or the real people should actually model their behavior after what they see in the media - as opposed to actual "IRL" interactions with their families, friends and colleagues.

Commercial media is and has always been a horrible place for real people to live. It has unrealistic expectations and incredibly life-threatening traumatic events on a regular basis. We get immersed in stories for the exact reason that they are not our lives, but drama is something we should all want to avoid in our real lives. I don't think Aristotle really explained all of drama in his short Poetics, but I agree that it is better to leave all the bloodshed, incest and murder in the theater rather than let it spill out on the street.

Also, even more tangentially, it does concern me a little bit that the commercial media has somewhat colonized and monopolized our imaginations. That rather than the shared myths and legends of the past, copyrighted, stage managed, and corporate owned products from Star Wars to Marvel to Pixar to Netflix, etc., makes up our culture (or pseudo-culture).

They are called "I.P." or "intellectual property" and that property is really owned usually by some massive corporation rather than any particular author and certainly not by the culture at large. Yet, really, the property where these products operate is in our own imaginations. In a sense, we're not really buying these products with our money, but with pieces of our own minds.

I think that the fact however a person defines their identity, it involves all sorts of commercial accessories to express it even in one's own imagination. It's commercial culture.

5

22OregonJB t1_iwzb8hg wrote

Damn. That is one of the most articulate well thought out arguments I have seen in my 6 years on Reddit. I had to read it 3 times to understand it and it makes perfect sense to me as that is what’s happening around us.

But it leaves me asking why the majority of us continue to let this dictate our lives. I know it’s instinctively in us to compare but we continue to compare ourselves to lives that we know are false or not attainable.

Not sure what your taste in music is but this makes me think of a song called propaganda by Dax. There is a powerful scene in the video when he goes to check on a friend he hasn’t heard from. That friend is sitting in a recliner staring at the news on a TV in a almost comatose state. While there is a huge white beam of energy shooting in him from that TV. It goes on to say that the news ticker at the bottom of the screen is called a news feed and we are a product of what we feed our brain.

When I learned about stoicism and the fact that we have virtually no control of the things that happen around and to us only how we react to it I was able to see things differently. Comparing my life to others made less sense after internalizing that. Instead of comparing myself to others I break down each day by contrasting my actions against the virtues I believe to be important and if I took the correct steps to live my best life that day. This is not to say that I don’t find myself doing exactly what you explained at times but it helps center me when I do.

2

Small-Talent-For-War t1_iwzg5ap wrote

Those are good points. Particularly in the sense that we are so connected to our media fairly constantly - and honestly have been since radio and television. Even the "Post" and print were fairly ubiquitous. It brings up the question how much of our lives and personalities are actually the result of the essentially fictional or imaginary products that occupy so much of our day to day time and attention.

"We are what we consume" in a sense and since most of what we consume is media, then we are what we watch as well.

1

nitrohigito t1_iwvl9jv wrote

I really don't understand why the focus on comparisons, Reddit and Discord generate the exact same level of apathy and depression, and there are no "personalities" being followed or misrepresented here.

2

JBK01 t1_iwvw8iq wrote

Isn't it a bit of a blanket generalisation to depart from? Probably depends on which strains you follow?

3

22OregonJB t1_iwx9u80 wrote

Of course there are personalities and personas comparisons on Reddit or Discord. Probably more so as we now have to introduce the complete anonymity of these sites into the equation. Using Facebook, Instagram or the like you are at least dealing with a person that has some degree of accountability to some people in their lives because they aren’t anonymous. That user tends to leave out all the bad or embarrassing parts of their lives mostly choosing to add or expound the good parts of their lives.

Now let’s factor in anonymity. We have people hiding behind a keyboard and monitor. I’m speaking in generalities but we get the people who are looking for attention as well. They just tend to do it the opposite way with negativity. The trolls who say and act in ways they lack the courage to do in real life. Now one could look at that two ways. I could think I’m such a great person because I don’t say or act like the internet trolls hiding in anonymity. Or I could think that the world is really worse than it is because the trolls paint it that way. Either way it is human nature to compare things but we need to have an accurate picture to compare ourselves too and an edited or unreal personality is not the way to do it in a healthy manner. Here are the choices. Compare oneself to all of the fake beautiful perfect lives on social media that aren’t anonymous or the depths of negativity with people that don’t act or say those things that are on anonymous social media. Or we can recognize that our instinct is to compare and just make better choices of what we compare ourselves too. Looking inward at our own moral compass and virtues. Looking in the mirror daily and comparing our actions of the day to the person we want to be.

1

basickarl t1_iwx3bdc wrote

They also happen to think they are more important than everyone else.

1

QTown2pt-o t1_iwvmi5b wrote

Everyone seeks their look. Since it is no longer possible to base any claim on one's own existence, there is nothing for it but to perform an appearing act without concerning oneself with being - or even with being seen. So it is not: I exist, I am here! but rather: I am visible, I am an image -look! look! This is not even narcissism, merely an extraversion without depth, a sort of self-promot­ing ingenuousness whereby everyone becomes the manager of their own appearance.

Jean Baudrillard, The Transparency of Evil: Essays in Extreme Phenomena

37

[deleted] t1_iwwcses wrote

[deleted]

24

a_pope_on_a_rope t1_iwzfb7d wrote

Thanks for posting. I have stepped away from all “personal” social media interactions too (I still use Reddit because I am more comfortable with anonymity), and I’ve noticed how hard it is to “be real” with my friends now. I feel like I’m giving them 100% of my attention in the moment now, but they’re able to give me back less. I’ve been trying to understand if I am just “too extra” but now I’m wondering if they’re just distracted by having to maintain their digital and and analog self.

2

chiefmors t1_iwvaep6 wrote

I think it's very obvious what social media is good for (casual communication) and what it sucks at (explaining and providing meaning for life).

As always, having confidence, discipline, and self worth to be independently capable of happiness and moral goodness matters.

16

QiPowerIsTheBest t1_iwzi3xy wrote

I find a lot of value in social media for philosophical discussions and finding info I most likely would never have come across. It sucks for politics and comparing yourself to others.

3

PyrrhoTheSkeptic t1_iwvr2ne wrote

>and empower us to fight back

It is really easy not to feel terrible from people's Facebook posts. Just don't use Facebook. The same applies to any other online platform that makes one feel terrible.

I personally have never had a Facebook page as it never seemed like a good idea to me. Keeping superficial contact with "friends" and family isn't my thing. Friends and family who wish to maintain contact can do so in an individual way. If they don't want to do that, then that tells you something important about the closeness of the relationship and what it means to them. And if you don't want to bother with individual contact with your "friends" and family, that indicates something important about how you feel about them.

13

postart777 t1_iwvxsga wrote

This man has a heavy namesake to live up to.

6

S-Vagus t1_iwvywxe wrote

That first sentence. What weak and pathetic English is everyone using? Declarative? Imperative? Does anyone not know that if we allow English to become ALL business language then words will become a subscription set for stupid people that we corral into crunch patterns?

I lament the lack of intelligent language users.

3

emerging_potato t1_iwyazpj wrote

I, too, lament the lack of intelligence amongst language users. What grinds my gears even more is that the use of intelligent language is so lacking.

Stupidity be damned!

3

S-Vagus t1_iwyda7p wrote

Join the call: https://youtu.be/1C6u5Ug41zc

I say dancing should replace all spoken language, just for laughs if nothing else.

3

[deleted] t1_iwyfa3e wrote

Ahhhh, interpretive dance? Yes!

5

S-Vagus t1_iwyllyy wrote

Sure. What's a dance and how do you interpret it? If only there was some sort of Master of a certain style of dance that could satisfy these criteria for anyone. shrug

While everyone is at it feel free to also teach me English that other humans can and will respect in any meaningful way that helps me provide for my daughter and wife. It's okay if not though, I get you're all busy with being distracted and disrespecting artists.

2

testperfect t1_iwxo20d wrote

Lol no. But i do feel bad for you all.

3

somethingclassy t1_iwy9v1b wrote

I have studied Debord for many years. While he as brilliant and had many good ideas, keep in mind that in the end he killed himself. A man's life is the test of his philosophy.

2

kenjose t1_iwyo4z6 wrote

Watching a talk from a guy named Jaron Lanier convinced me to delete my FAcebook

2

AncientShakthimaan t1_iwz5yae wrote

If you look at tv show or movies actor & actress are portrayed perfect physically if you look at them long enough you can begin to hate yourself at small imperfection.social media is same in that regard.

I Think In life People Should Understand You Can Never Be Perfect But You Can Be Better.

1

Darigone t1_iwzbmbu wrote

Lolol to fight back? Why is everything voiced like its a damn battle. Ohh noo my "feelings" wel!!!! Fight back in this war of i dont know how to exit an internet tab sooo outcy outch. Lolol

1

JustAPerspective t1_iwwexef wrote

Only if one presumes what social media conveys is truthful.

Not sure they incorporate GIGO.

0