Thanks so much. I have time tomorrow and will go through the link you sent. I agree with you that he chooses this behaviour, as he treats his friends (he only has 2 or 3) and even strangers much kinder. Will listen to their problems and comfort people. But he won't do that at home. He was better with my daughter when she was a baby. But when she started to talk he backed away. Like I say, he hates communication. This is damaging to my daughter. She is so smart, as in, years ahead of her age academically. So she doesn't miss much, she catches everything he does. She has basically given up waiting for him to show love.