M30 F30 Girlfriend gave her number to another guy?

Submitted by otot1993 t3_127hztn in relationship_advice

My girlfriend told me she met this guy on a bus to campus, saw him a couple of times but no interaction, then he went and spoke to her told her he doesn't know anybody and she offered to help, she gave him her number, that makes me feel uneasy not because I am insecure about the guy but why would she feel so comfortable to share her number with a guy she just met and clearly using a pick up line. We had an argument she says I am blowing this out of proportion, but surley if the guy needs help you can give him an email and put him onto some of his people and no have to go out of your way. I think is disrespectful to give out ur personal number to the first guy that chats to you.

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1

heyitsmarc t1_jee7fxf wrote

I think it’s worth exploring why you feel disrespected or uncomfortable that your girlfriend gave her number to someone. Do you feel that your girlfriend shouldn’t give her number out to people, specifically guys?

−9

otot1993 OP t1_jee8u5b wrote

Replying to heyitsmarc (#2,523,750)

I think it's more about the fact that she just met this guy. She has male friends, and I don't have problems with her exchanging her number with a co-worker or people she knows. But a guy comes to you, chats to you, tells you that he's new there and you tell him you going to help meeting people and giving out your number like this? You don't know him, you don't know his intentions, and as a man kinda hurts that my girlfriend wouldn't shut this down before it even becomes something.

14

Chrrr91 t1_jee8xi9 wrote

Well I’ll say that she did not have to share that information with you. If she had bad intentions, you would not be knowing about the interaction.

−7

otot1993 OP t1_jee958r wrote

Replying to Chrrr91 (#2,524,195)

Well, I agree with you in part. She could've kept it a secret. But I trust her. This is not about trust. But is it ok to just give out the number like that? She could've given him an email and support him like that.

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Ill_Temperature898 t1_jeebt0r wrote

Yeah, not ok. I would tell her she now knows the boundaries as far as you are concerned and if it happens again its over. Then drop it and move on.

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TheSaltRose t1_jeef6qg wrote

….you’re uneasy because she’s being nice?

You don’t deserve her.

−20

ExpensiveEntrance2 t1_jeejnab wrote

These comments are naive

If this guy didn't know anybody why is he approaching random girls on the bus rather than people in his class? The answer is because he's trying to do something with your gf

Now you've got to deal with the fact that you're dating a 30 year old who doesn't understand that strangers trying to get her number aren't looking to be friends, this sort of short sightedness will lead to some very inappropriate moments

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otot1993 OP t1_jeenic7 wrote

Replying to TheSaltRose (#2,526,313)

No, i feel uneasy at the fsct she gave her number away. I love her because she is nice and kind. But as a man, it looks to me that the guy is trying to do something. Maybe i am wrong, and i can apologise if i am, but highly doubt it

13

Indecks9999 t1_jeevnes wrote

He will use the number, but not asking for help. He will ask her to lunch or coffee next.

Its in the players handbook

Its such a common thing. Go to google and search "if a girl gives you her number is she interested"

Im not saying your GF is interested but many people are just too nice (naive) and this can cause misunderstandings

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lost_jjm t1_jef0f5a wrote

There are 2 options, either she is a bit naive when it comes to this or she isnt. and to be honest, i thnk both would be concerning to me.

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Unable_Duty7809 t1_jef5727 wrote

Woman don't like to ever have their behavior checked. It's 100% inappropriate for her to be giving out her number to random guys. Just like it would be 100% inappropriate for you to be asking for numbers from random women.

The fact that she still pulls stunt like this at 30 is a huge red flag.

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Chrrr91 t1_jeg6t50 wrote

Replying to otot1993 (#2,524,263)

Okay than I guess if you are not insecure, what are you upset about? Why email? If I’m in some kind of trouble, need advice I’m not going to email. I barely check the damn thing. How is it disrespectful to give out ur phone number to guy if this has nothing to with trust or insecurities?

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