Okay... But the comment your wife made makes it clear that it's more than just money issues. And did you include your wife on making a budget??

Why does she not want couples counseling??

There's a lot of missing info here. I asked some very specific questions that you ignored and/or gave a basic answer too.

Have you asked her to write out what she feels needs to be worked on in your marriage??

Also your daughter is not biologically her child correct?? You've written multiple times that the daughter is only related to you and not your wife. Has that created some issues as well?