Submitted by Big_Pirate2229 t3_zzy4tn in relationship_advice

i (23F) feel like im super boring now with my boyfriend (23M) and don’t know how to bring the spark back

We’ve been talking for about 5 months and in a relationship for 2 months. We had great, fun conversations before and were constantly talking, and it was amazing. But now it seems like I don’t have much to say or like, I’m just being boring.

I’m generally not much of a talker. I like my deep intellectual conversations but other than that I have a hard time just starting random conversations unless it’s just about what I’m doing. I’m not really a gossiper either. I just don’t know what to talk about anymore and I feel like I’m starting to bore him.

He’s the opposite. He’s a big talker, always looking for conversation with random people. When he and his friends are talking, they seem like they have so much fun, but when it’s just us, he just doesn’t light up like he does with them.

I feel like I’m just a boring person, and that he’ll eventually just get tired of me and want to leave. I don’t know how to change.

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darethshirl t1_j2fx0fj wrote

don't make assumptions about how he feels! maybe he appreciates the peace he feels around you. have a serious talk with him asking him if he's feeling unsatisfied in your relationship, and if he is THEN you can both come up with ways to change things

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bumblebeequeer t1_j2fmshu wrote

If you’ve run out of things to talk about and spending time together is painful after five months, it sounds like the relationship isn’t going to work. You two might just not have enough chemistry, which is okay.

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UnquantifiableLife t1_j2f5aqp wrote

You're not boring, you just have different interests. It's only been 5 months, it sounds like you're just not compatible and your relationship has reached its natural end.

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