unfortunetely obsessing over human behaviour and analysing every detail is part of my problem especially combined with deep feelings and my goal was to relieve myself and not causing more problems, I am also having a hard time to understand how I might have irritated her, since I tried to hide it and I think I managed to do that very well and I was looking as intensely and enquiring at her as I did with everyone else.

Things without logic are very hard for me to let go and I have to admit I am a bit hurt by it and I know I have the courage to these things. It's not hard for me, normal things are though. And I am beating myself up, because I am emotionally unstable. She also praised me for having the courage but then contradicted herself by making me insecure with her behaviour.

Thanks for reading my long post though!