There's a lot of history to 'okama', originally it was referring to effeminate men who were often (but iirc not always) prostitutes. It wasn't necessarily pejorative, more like a profession or a descriptor. Then you know time progressed, religious morality came in, and it became a Bad Thing, and a slur.

Nowadays there are people who have reclaimed it in the LGBT sphere, and it's usage in gay bars is similar to 'femme' (or maybe even 'twink'), but obviously that is not gonna be the case with a bunch of teenagers or anyone remotely homophobic.

I can dig out some references if anyone wants them.