don't try to give reasons for why you did it (i.e. people on tiktok do it as well), you're not looking for her to understand your point of view. you have to make it clear to her that you have thought about het point of view and about how it might have come across, and apologize. you don't want/need her to understand what you did, you already did it. at this point it's mostly about your ability to empathize and coming to terms with the fact you did something wrong.