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Greatknight99 t1_j7nqa6a wrote

The solution is simple:

  1. Check to see if this guy has cameras and keep track of how often he visits.
  2. Go to Goodwill in Williston and buy a ski mask, they're like $5.
  3. Start shitting on his lawn and front stoop/stoop of this new airbnb at night. Try to leave your house, drive your car or bike down the road before doing this. Ditch the car and walk either down the road or through the woods so you can say you were gone when it happened.
  4. If step 3 doesn't ward off the downstaters, buy a gorilla suit and run through the woods at night, throwing shit like big rocks at their place. When interacting with them during the day, actively gaslight the neighbor into believing Bigfoot is real. Do this slowly over time, adding it more and more into conversation. Make sure to shit on your own lawn and break your own windows to make it look real. You could also post the location on Bigfoot research forums online and see if paranormal researchers flood the place and scare off airbnb people.
  5. Step 4 could take a while, so if you're impatient, make friends with the host on social media. Constantly tag them in politically and morally terrible takes as though they agree with you. Block or remove any comments they make disagreeing with it. Meanwhile, buy flags of totalitarian countries/ political parties that are controversial and raise them so airbnb people can see them.
  6. When all else has failed, just start shitting on the lawn during the day where renters can see you. Pay a local actor to pretend to be your concerned sibling who is looking after you. Have the actor apologize to the people after you crap on their lawn/stoop on your behalf. Bonus points if you let them come up with unique excuses as to why you're doing this.

I love my state, but this would be considerably faster and cheaper than waiting for state government to create legislation that fixes this deeply rooted problem. Also, this guy is from Connecticut, these actions would probably be an improvement on his quality of life.

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