I think the nature of how this conversation is framed shows a lot about people’s views on the relationship between a man and a woman in society. I ironically just had this type of conversation with my long term girlfriends dad - I asked him for his blessings and support, but I was never about to ask him for his direct permission. That’s way too patriarchal for me (and GF was completely on the same page). We did it over a pretty casual breakfast (this seems too fancy for me but just my .02) and I was more looking for any advice that he had as I respect him a lot and obviously, he’s been in this situation before so it was a learning opportunity for me too. I think phrasing it as permission is creepy and weird. I also think that if I didn’t have his support it wouldn’t have changed things but him giving his support made me feel more valued and more welcomed into their family which was important as we live on opposite sides of the country and do not see each other often at all.