Yup, if you don't know what the other prefers, talking about it is the only way to learn that.

It is your house. If your only options for workspace are the living room or your bedroom, you have to work in one or the other ... And living room seems entirely reasonable to me.

I wouldn't be so worried about inconveniencing MIL who is sleeping in your living room for 6 months. If she doesn't like it, she can go live somewhere else.

Girl, you just need to get out.

What advice are you looking for here? I mean, to me the answer is obvious: leave. This guy's manipulative and abusive.

• he decided BIL would live with you without bothering to clear it with you first. Oh, and BIL is a freeloader so you're paying his living expenses too.

• he then claimed you were just as bad because you ... got skin care treatment without telling him? Oh, dude. Yeah, that's not the same as having an entire extra person living in your house.

• MIL also lives with you. I'm gonna guess you weren't consulted about this either and hubby just presented it to you as a done deal.

• you have a demanding job and have to work late frequently, which is hard to do because MIL is sleeping in living room and hubby goes to sleep early in bedroom. So you work in the dark to avoid inconveniencing all these people who are not concerned about inconveniencing you.

• he took your laptop from you when you were in the middle of doing work, and refused to give it back. Then he got physical and hurt you.

Yeah.

No more evidence needed here. Leave.

Talk about it, in detail. Talk about what needs to get done, and how often it should get done (you two may have differing opinions on this). Then divide it all up - if there are things you hate doing but he doesn't mind, he gets those, and vice versa what what he hates doing. Then the other stuff gets divided equally by the time it takes. Idea is that you each end up with a roughly equal time commitment to get your share done.

You could decide to switch it off by week or month or whatever, so nobody's stuck with the same chores forever.

I agree with you that you shouldn't be "in charge' and have to tell him to do things. But I'm guessing from your description that his opinion on how often things need to get done differs from yours, so you get to the point where you think it needs doing before he does. Y'all just need to talk about it and come up with a plan than works for you both, which seems fair and equal.