Zankeru

Zankeru t1_jcszcww wrote

"We can do whatever we want, nothing matters."

My philosophy is that experiencing life is the whole point. You cant "waste" it by doing one thing rather than the other. Nothing has inherent value over anything else. What you can do is waste time doing things that dont make you feel good.

This often leads to people thinking they should do nothing but leisure activities, like you brought up. But you already see the flaw in that. We live in human bodies that are programmed to desire purpose and usefullness to the community. Avoiding that to chase leisure 24/7 (and becoming rich enough for that lifestyle) is the source of people feeling like they are wasting their life imo.

But that's just like my opinion, man. I would recommend you sit down and write out what exactly your brain wants you to do and why. What type of person or goal would you be interested in working towards? Not one that society perscribes (aka: degree, family, kids, highest paying job possible, retire, die) but something that provokes a real emotional reaction. Listing out the responsibilities you mentioned avoiding and examining those would be a good start. Listen to what your emotions are guiding you towards.

Easy example from me: Had 8 years in the military and would have pension if I stayed another 12. Extremely easy job, but felt like shit the whole time. The advice from everyone around me was to just stick it out because the job had great benefits and retirement. Instead I quit and went from a highly valued job to delivering pizzas. Almost the exact opposite of what US culture would advise. But I hadnt felt better mentally since middle school.

That kind of planning can be hard in the middle of depression, so you may need to focus on eliminating stressors first. I had a huge personality shift and change in desires after I got out of my depression and stopped suppressing emotions.

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