alcobain1967

alcobain1967 t1_jbjze8u wrote

Reply to TIFU by almost getting myself killed at the gym by okbuddy9970

The next time the bully fucks with you, hit him square in the face. Comes up to you in the hall-BAM! Right in the nose. Comes up to you in the cafeteria-SLAM!- hit him right in the face with your whole lunch tray (or can of soda). Yes, you may get in trouble...but he will never fuck with you again.

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alcobain1967 t1_iy6aezs wrote

Reply to comment by nicokokun in Someone must have died while watching porn. Finding them must have been really awkward by Dreamweaver_21

I believe it helped him achieve and maintain his erection. The wife was so embarassed, but I never got to talk to her. The medical examiner and another detective did that. I did go to the autopsy and collected the rubber bands as evidence just in case something suspicious popped up later. It was classified as a natural death as the cause of death was heart/coronary issues. But I guess he died doing something he enjoyed.......

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alcobain1967 t1_iy5dpr7 wrote

Reply to Someone must have died while watching porn. Finding them must have been really awkward by Dreamweaver_21

Story time: I'm a retired cop. The last 11 years of my career I was a detective assigned to our crime scene unit. I was on day shift. Got a call for a dead guy. Guy was about 60 and was a farmer. Wife leaves to go shopping. When she left, he was working in the pasture.
She comes home and he's dead, naked, in their bed. He's got two huge rubber bands looped around his legs and then wrapped around his dick. The guy just wanted to have a little wank and died in the most embarassing way-at least for his wife. That was a memorable scene.

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