Bro, you're that swollen you won't be able to see out of one of your eyes for a few days, plus, if I was your boss, I'd rather a heads up "hey, knocked my eyebrow today, got a bit of a bruise, happy to still come in but it's not pretty. OK if I wear an eye patch?" rather than you rocking up looking like you lost a round to Muhammad Ali. As a patron, I'd be worried for the kid who's serving me with a massive black eye swollen shut.

I'm not a doc, but see how it's already blooming down one side of your eye? I think it'll probably bruise the whole way round. I wouldn't be surprised if you copped your eye a bit too. You'll probably wake up with a throbbing headache tomorrow.

You do you, bro. It'll definitely get worse before it gets better. Keep up the ice packs and pain relief. See a doc if the swelling doesn't subside in a few days.

Mate, you need to sit up and ice that bitch!

Try sleep sitting up and when you can get some Arnica cream on the bruise on your eyebrow (try keep it away from your eyes) it'll draw the bruise out making it worse, but then getting better quickly.

Try take some anti inflammatories (ibuprofen or whatever the US equivalent is) sleep with a cool wet flannel (if you can sleep with a fan on to keep the flannel cool if that works)

If you're worried about needing to work, see if your boss will let you get away with an eye patch at least then you can work without scaring your customers.

(plus, see if your increasingly outlandish stories about how it happened gets you better tips)

Good luck bro, next time just avoid turkies and tables!

Same! 19 years old here.

Except I only got her when she was 10, so I don't know how her life was before me. But she's thriving. Still doing zoomies and headbutting me for food (even though she's got like 3 teeth haha)