I get it. I’m like your wife- I don’t do the words of affirmation thing, and that’s what my husband needs. He has to remind me, too, since it’s so counter to my personality (which is dysfunctional, don’t get me wrong). What’s easier for us is for me to remember to thank him every so often, which often transitions to compliments.

I think you would both tremendously benefit from couples counseling- I think you both just need to learn to hear each other and speak in the same language. Not to be cliche about it.

You are a TEAM. Act like it.

It doesn’t matter whose day to day is harder. It’s COVID times. It’s all fucking hard.

Your wife is reaching out asking for validation, because unlike you, she doesn’t have performance evaluations, raise negotiations, or even colleagues to pat her on the butt and say “rough one out there today, huh”. She’s communicating- albeit poorly- with the adult who’s supposed to have her back.

So have it! You tell us all about the great respect you have for SAHP- tell her!

And tell her how hard your days are, too. Be honest. Send her memes about office work. There’s no shortage.

This is AMAZING for a five year old- she’s going all the way!