jamicam

jamicam t1_jeg9ptf wrote

Reply to comment by pancake_gofer in My gf [F22] is unhappy with me [M24] because I asked her if she'd be comfortable with my meeting an ex who asked to catch up. My gf wasn't comfortable with it, so I said no to a meetup. Said ex is in a serious relationship & we ended amicably, and apparently the latter fact makes my gf unhappy too? by [deleted]

You do not meet with up an ex when you are in a new committed relationship.

You based your decision on your gf - if she wasn't comfortable, you wouldn't go. You put it on her.

Instead, it should have been that you told the ex no, and then told the gf that she asked and you declined.

Have clean and clear boundaries and don't allow these kind of messy things to happen. Your ex is your past. Move forward and stop looking back. Be committed and responsible in your new relationship.

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jamicam t1_jeg4htw wrote

Reply to My gf [F22] is unhappy with me [M24] because I asked her if she'd be comfortable with my meeting an ex who asked to catch up. My gf wasn't comfortable with it, so I said no to a meetup. Said ex is in a serious relationship & we ended amicably, and apparently the latter fact makes my gf unhappy too? by [deleted]

You declined the invite because of your gf's reaction, not because you knew it is a bad idea to meet up with an ex while you are in a committed relationship.

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jamicam t1_jeg3a6t wrote

Reply to did we 23f 25m make a waitress uncomfortable and if so how? by [deleted]

If tipping isn't the expectation, then just do not tip. Follow the norms of wherever you live.

Don't worry so much if this one waitress was offended, she was probably just caught off guard. Relax, let it go - you didn't do anything malicious or with bad intent, so all is good.

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jamicam t1_jeg1yf7 wrote

Reply to husband's coworker ( F30) asking my husband why he's so protective of me (f 29) by [deleted]

This is something for your husband to work out with his colleague. If they are friendly at work, she may feel close to him as a friend and doesn't realize how her behavior is coming across to you. If it makes your husband uncomfortable, he should let her know, or start to distance himself from her at work, or whatever. Or maybe she is just socially awkward and doesn't understand personal boundaries.

If she asks you personal questions, don't answer them. Have an answer ready, like, "Oh, my husband and I don't discuss personal details about our relationship" and then change the topic.

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jamicam t1_jeg0puu wrote

Reply to How do I (33M) keep things interesting (31F) when I’m boring? by [deleted]

Just be honest with her. "Hey, I'm not great at keeping conversations going and it causes me some anxiety. I really want to get to know each other and don't want you to misinterpret any silence as lack of interest."

Most people would be very understanding about something like that, if you show some vulnerability and honesty.

Also, consider getting one of those packs of questions that are intended for couples to get to know each other. It's a fun game to play, just answer a few of the questions together and relax.

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jamicam t1_jefyskw wrote

Reply to [22F/28M] I woke up to see that fiancé left for work without saying anything after a heavy discussion last night and I don't know if I should reach out or wait. by [deleted]

Both of you need to work on communication. Money is a tough topic for a lot of couples. You need to talk about it openly, honestly, and without getting angry at each other. Give him a little space and then time to have a talk about improving communication so that when you do disagree it doesn't become a huge problem, just an issue to work through together. Then together explore some resources on good communication in relationships, like this - you can find a lot with a few simple google searches:

https://www.healthline.com/health/lack-of-communication#signs-of-a-problem

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