kitalorian

kitalorian t1_jats6v4 wrote

As someone with diagnosed psychotic symptoms attached to my diagnosed autism, sensory experiences are ABSOLUTELY a leap of faith at times.

No, do not have bugs crawling on my skin even though I feel them sometimes, because I can't see them. No one else can either because no one is addressing them.

No, people aren't calling my name in 50 different directions, and I know because no one else is looking around or at me with expectations.

So I don't react, because despite the legitimate-feeling sensory experience no individual is going to take kindly to me screaming and running around scratching myself or yelling "who said my name".

So no, the title is correct.

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kitalorian t1_its2jt8 wrote

I think of it like this:

If you weigh the outcomes between contacting a doctor again or not, which choice produces less stress in the long-term (because today is just right now)?

The temporary, but immediate and insistent stress of a phone call? And then hopefully help, maybe some meds, more support?

Or....

Your mental health declining until doing all of the above things is harder and there's more stress because you haven't been able to keep up with life around you?

Absolutely no hate, I've been there, but what makes me do the healthy thing for myself nowadays, after failing so many times, is knowing through failure which outcome leads where, and parenting my slightly-broken mind to do the thing that will hurt me less overall. Because how can I complain when I'm not helping myself, ya know?

I hope you feel better <3

Quick edit: also, stress and anxiety around doctors is normal. Don't be hard on yourself about feeling those things, just don't let them hold you back from getting healthier and feeling better things

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kitalorian t1_itqa421 wrote

As someone who is permanently disabled, this is a WILD comment.

I have to work, or I die. Like most people. But I become psychotic with stress, which I push past (with doctor's help) because I HAVE to. Or else, once again, I DIE.

"Nothing in the working world is worth your mental health?" What about existing?

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