We try to have everyone get together for other people's birthdays but since my mom's is on a holiday mostly everyone has the day off. It's just easier for everyone to make it on hers.

I thought your comment was a little out of line and after seeing your second comment calling me a "16 year old spoiled brat rich white girl" unprovoked I can see you're really not here to give any helpful advise. I am 23, work a full time job, and am Mexican. You are ridiculous.

And I agree with you. I don't want him to feel like his birthday comes second ever, eventually it will come first. For now I want them to feel equally as important to me and I am having trouble juggling them in a way that makes them both feel good. It's bad enough they have to share with a major holiday.

Yikes, you're right. That's not something I want him to have to do though. Maybe I should compromise a little more and say we can go back really early on the 1st like another commenter said.

My entire extended family gets together the night of the 31st and it's like the celebration for my mom's birthday as well.

To me the fact that it's a holiday doesn't matter much. Spending it with friends is not something that I want to do. I place more importance on their birthdays and since my entire extended family gets together on the 31st they take the opportunity to celebrate my mom's birthday. I am also very close to my mom, we have a really good relationship.