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amortizedeeznuts t1_iy1o120 wrote

i must be dead inside because this did nothing for me. as a future self to my old self my future self to my present self will probably be just as bitter, resigned, self loathing, petty, and angry towards me as i am to my old self.

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Notthe0ne t1_iy1tcfn wrote

Get a little older, we get kinder to ourselves I promise.

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amortizedeeznuts t1_iy2b309 wrote

I think we just lose the energy to be angry, which also means losing the energy to do much about becoming the future self you want to be

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Wchijafm t1_iy3ei41 wrote

I disagree. I used to look back at my past and be embarrassed, angry at wasted time/potential, and all around blame for where my life is now. Now I look back with compassion, past me was going thru some rough times with basically zero coping skills and an inability to ask for help. She was doing the best she could with what she had. This shift came about for me when I stopped worrying about blame and started to accept what had happened and immediately look for solutions. When I accepted the past is the past and cannot be changed no matter how many times you relive it inside your head.

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action_lawyer_comics t1_iy1uo9h wrote

Let me ask, are you doing anything now to make your future self proud? I was pretty miserable for a long time too, and it wasn't until I got out of that particular dark chapter and did some good for myself that I was able to be compassionate towards past me. I know it is a bit of a chicken and an egg problem, but if you can start working on your future self, it becomes easier to forgive your past self. At least that's how it worked for me.

Peace, friend

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FizzleKit10 t1_iy1ycjo wrote

My future self is probably dead...

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stiiknafuulia t1_iy2fhml wrote

Somehow I heard Elliott Smith sing this out. Cheered me up way more than this feelgood tip (don't get me wrong; it's useful, but hard to remember when you need it the most).

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jw60888 t1_iy2e1e4 wrote

It is hard but you must forgive yourself and learn to move on. You can’t change the past but you can change the future.

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