Comments

You must log in or register to comment.

altbekannt t1_izicd16 wrote

They also make zero money.

165

pizzacake15 t1_iziel0d wrote

Bite everyone at work. Got it.

120

brightlocks t1_izlfc8p wrote

I’ve already been thrown out of one gym for biting . Guess every day is Monday at that gym and they need to HTFU.

2

MichelewithoneL t1_izifa5i wrote

Yeah but sharks don’t have life sucking commutes and bills. It’s so interesting to see what different people find motivating, because this is just silly to me lol

99

dedicated-pedestrian t1_izirtoj wrote

To be honest the "bite everyone" mindset could be dangerous for commuters. A recipe for road rage.

19

Jak_n_Dax t1_izl0we3 wrote

This entire sub is just recycled Facebook garbage.

3

hEsNotomhardy t1_izmkrqh wrote

Yeah but Redditors are way more funny than The Boom Boom Metaverse, at least imho. And I am now a shark

2

Minerva9684 t1_izlemlq wrote

If you got bills to pay (like the majority of us) then thats all the more reason to get up and get going on Monday!

2

FlatPineappleSociety t1_iziix3d wrote

Sounds like something an 80s guy with boneitis would say

89

Redcoatninja t1_izm66uh wrote

Because sharks don't have necks, necks are for sheep!

2

gaussianCopulator t1_izigv4i wrote

They also don't stop on Saturday, any holiday, any bereavement and so on and so forth. Are you sure we want to go down that road? What is required is a 4 day work week and fair wages.

18

G-H-O-S-T t1_izingex wrote

This is corporate propaganda not motivation

18

AndrewNB411 t1_izibf0e wrote

That’s just not what they do. In fact on Monday’s they love the thermal vents

17

snapper1971 t1_izikbgk wrote

How insufferably stupid.

12

PorkPyeWalker t1_izikmwv wrote

Don't forget to cure your bone-itis though.

12

Yasathyasath t1_izifytr wrote

Ok First of all they don't know its Monday. That's it that's all I wanted to say

11

IceFireHawk t1_izi9vlg wrote

I haven’t seen this episode of Shark Tank. Who bit the entrepreneur? I bet it was Mark

9

Atypicalicious t1_izlwgv7 wrote

Know what’s dark? Mark the shark on a lark in a kiddie park.

1

Busy_Brilliant_27 t1_izie3po wrote

Wait till this guy realises that sharks are one of the most calm animals out there

9

oatmeal28 t1_izik0aq wrote

r/justlearnedtheFWord

9

zionthelyon t1_izilhib wrote

That's what the 80s taught us.

"There are two types of people. Sheep and sharks. Anyone who's a sheep is fired. Who's a sheep?"

7

TheErisedHD t1_izilugl wrote

This reads like a Cave Johnson quote. Sharks aren't working soulless corporate jobs.

7

Merciless972 t1_izljnq3 wrote

And if they were, they would bite the hell of the person responsible of such nonsense.

2

liamthelemming t1_izim809 wrote

Nobody needs this bullshit Jaws propaganda. Sharks are just trying to eat, stop looking like a sealion from beneath on your damn surfboard.

6

zman0313 t1_izinkob wrote

They can also sleep while they’re swimming. I can’t sleep while I’m working

5

Storytellerjack t1_iziossm wrote

This is dumb. We don't need to glorify work. Sharks aren't scary, they only harm surfers off the coast of Australia, and fewer than five per year on average.

5

ZensukePrime t1_izkkkwp wrote

Sharks don't spend their days catching fish just to give it to a bigger shark that then let's them keep a small percentage of their catch...

5

Gunthrix t1_izijslv wrote

Nah I'll keep myself at the top of the food chain as a human, seeing my own goals and accomplishing them at a nonburnout pace

3

[deleted] t1_izilj4w wrote

Sharks don't have to pay rent, deal with morons or resist their urge to kill everything in sight under threat of arrest.

3

akmjolnir t1_izismrt wrote

Is this Andrew Tate's burner?

Or did he change his name yet...Talibandrew or something deep like that?

3

Terrik1337 t1_izkw7kd wrote

A team of researchers attached cameras to a wide range of animals. In 100s of hours of footage, one shark ate one jellyfish. Sharks are not known for their work ethic.

3

UncertainMorale t1_izijmrt wrote

Be like a Turd. A Turd lays around all day stinking.

2

R0STBRKR t1_izijzuz wrote

I always find those things super dumb and I feel like this usually has the opposite effect.

2

elpajaroquemamais t1_izj632v wrote

Just because they are out doing what they are supposed to do to survive doesn’t mean they don’t feel pain or love doing it. This is dumb.

2

enigma2118 t1_izkjkyf wrote

I’m still a shark! Look at my claws!

2

mavman42 t1_izknc9t wrote

Kinda cringe OP

2

Saintmikey t1_izks2qq wrote

Ha ha cringe content ha

2

_CMDR_ t1_izkuqq4 wrote

Sharks have no bosses and all of their effort is their own. They have no concept of Monday because nobody is profiting off of them.

2

RagAndBows t1_izkvp34 wrote

Sharks don't have to live under the exploitation of capitalism tho

2

Timbo_007 t1_izl76bz wrote

And you know what kills a shark? That poor south east asian fisherman out on the sea who hates mondays.

2

_n_o___o_n_e t1_izl9b98 wrote

I don’t think sharks know what time is but if they did it’d be fucking scary

2

Callasfan t1_izljes5 wrote

Do sharks complain about Mondays? NO! Because they have no concept of it.

2

anon3451 t1_izieg6m wrote

I'm a gazelle bru

1

Valeriand t1_izihaib wrote

They’re part of endangered species and they don’t realize they’re stuck in a pool

1

Rev_Grn t1_izijsfi wrote

Good advice.

If anyone needs me I'll be chilling out in the ocean taking things easy.

1

torsun t1_izilxjh wrote

Sounds like someone's got a case of the Mondays! (Literally watched it last night)

1

CorgiKnits t1_izimv0r wrote

God I’m working 6:30am-10:30pm today. I’m gonna have to be a shark to keep going.

1

GuiltyGrapefruit840 t1_izinch8 wrote

And elephants only need two hours of sleep a night. So be like the elephant you lazy humans! /s

1

fadoxi t1_izinhwl wrote

waltuh

1

The-Nic t1_izkjnza wrote

How would sharks know what day of the week it is?

1

Upst8r t1_izkjr71 wrote

That shark weekend was fun.

1

the_bionic_investor t1_izkk1z1 wrote

They’re also mostly brainless (compared to a human brain, of course).

1

DragonDeez t1_izkktby wrote

Yeah sharks also have no concept of time

1

hiphopvegan t1_izko4wc wrote

What would a shark do to her micromanaging boss on a Monday?

1

Aronchini t1_izkoyun wrote

Sharks only live about 25 years on average - ain’t got time to waste.

1

DefinitelyAFakeName t1_izkziqi wrote

Starve? Have no house? Give all leisure time to basic survival?

Nah fam. I'm gonna be a cozy sad gremlin on Monday

1

Yellopz t1_izl58ty wrote

You're such a shark, bro. Wow, aren't you amazing!

1

EvenBetterCool t1_izl6whj wrote

Sharks are cool. Not as scary as they are made out to be.

1

-ferth t1_izl7ooh wrote

And they never look back, because they don’t have necks. Necks are for sheep.

1

Queen_faf t1_izl8jv2 wrote

Why bother when i can sleep and pretend it’s still the WE 😅

1

sevbenup t1_izlg9p3 wrote

If you think you hate mondays you probably just hate capitalism

1

manthing11 t1_izlix8t wrote

Sharks also don’t have to answer to POS bosses.

1

Merciless972 t1_izlj3ie wrote

Idk man, that shark that got rotated once look pretty worried.

1

whoareyoutoquestion t1_izlor9n wrote

Sharks have the ability to leave an area of low food and seek an area that will support them

1

Sassycatfarts t1_izlscd2 wrote

And they don't look back cause they don't have necks, necks are for sheep.

1

bloxerator t1_izltu9j wrote

Being a shark is natural. The five day work week and capitalism are both unnatural.

1

Atypicalicious t1_izlw4qf wrote

Plus, they can’t talk. Or conceptualize days of the week. Thumb war is beyond their powers. They don’t do hugs. Genderfluidity escapes them. They’ll never calculate pi. Can’t lick stuff. Foreplay is beyond them.

1

Moclown t1_izmk1i4 wrote

Be like a shark. Choke on microplastics.

1

[deleted] t1_izmn2za wrote

They can swim around doing that though. Most of us are stuck in one place for 8+ hours of our day.

1

-DethLok- t1_izmvkdc wrote

Unpopular opinion coming!

I love Mondays, every Monday I wake up and remember that I'm retired and don't have to go to work anymore? So relaxing!

Sorry for you that are still working, though.

1

RunInRunOn t1_izpow5f wrote

Sharks don't complain about Monday because they know the real scourge is Sunday evening

1

loosersugar t1_izikl2b wrote

Are the neurotypicals ok?

0

Throwaway-tan t1_izilbcr wrote

Nobody is neurotypical these days, you've just got divergent expressions of mental illness. You're either depressed, manic or manic-depressed.

−4

[deleted] t1_izij139 wrote

I love this

−5