God, I can relate to this. Where you said about our efforts being on the right track, getting gently corrected if needed and then praised when we get it right. That is literally it! I'm scared of doing something wrong and getting out of my depth.

And also, the thing about getting guaranteed validation if it's someone else's task we're doing / some boss we're helping. Exactly. Cos there's very little to gain from our own tasks in the short term, the time in which we need to start building the business, for example. Plus no-one to correct us and the whole risk thing. So "what's the point", precisely. Or just it ends up being permanent procrastination because there's no 'first steps to whatever it is' teacher. Or there are... Youtubers who I think 'I could just message them if I get out of my depth'. But I'm still too concerned.

It's like I need a 9-5 experienced teacher, or ahead-of-me peer / colleague to be there while I do everything.

And I think this to myself, and look for accountability buddies but that's not enough... It's like I need a comforting person in the actual room!

Or the thing we were talking about at the start, which is some scary faculty of teachers who will be viciously disappointed if we do not get an A. I'd rather have the comforting teacher, but I have neither (given that I'm in my 30s!).