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AmargithHuld t1_j8z7eu7 wrote

It isnt my business until they make it my business and I gotto waste energy dealing with that, then getting back on track after being massively gutpunched and derailed.

That’s the part I avoid, really.

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tkdyo t1_j8zp780 wrote

This. Sometimes what people think of you gets you fired, or keeps you from getting a job/promotion, or isolates you in your small town.

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clitoreum t1_j90cvc2 wrote

Thing is, no one cares if you fail, I guarantee you they've done it before. What matters is what you do next.

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chairmanskitty t1_j90mlwg wrote

Having a job gets you money. Money is needed to exchange for sustenance. Not having sustenance means you die.

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King-Cobra-668 t1_j90s2i6 wrote

yeah, one toxic coworker shit talking you to everyone and highlighting your every mistake does actually matter especially because those types are constantly in your boss' ear

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OhWowItsJello t1_j92y5j5 wrote

Rational and reasonable people don't care if you fail. The shitty flip side of this coin is that there's no shortage of irrational and unreasonable people in the world.

Failure isn't the hard part, nor is other people seeing it, it's the people that go out of their way to shit on you for a shortcoming. I feel like there's at least one asshole for every two reasonable people, at least in a metropolitan area.

Your world view and experience is likely different if you live in a small town out in the boonies, where assholes can be pretty easily avoided. It's hard to avoid assholes in a literal sea of people.

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FirstMiddleLass t1_j90xx4p wrote

> What matters is what you do next.

Killing them all won't make your feel better.

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Aetra t1_j90swzu wrote

In mid 2020, one person at work thinking I was a bitch for ignoring and not talking to her cost me a promotion, friends, totally ruined my mental health for a long while, and nearly cost me my job. The reason I didn’t talk to her much? She was hired during lockdown when everyone was WFH and we worked in healthcare admin so we were all pretty bloody busy. I met her in person for the first time at the HR meeting for her complaints against me for workplace bullying.

If her opinion of me had been brought up with me and made my business before she went to HR, I wouldn’t have had to deal with that circus in addition to the hell scape that was 2020.

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One-Mind4814 t1_j903fuq wrote

Sometimes it’s better to keep your goals to yourself. I hate when people tell me I can’t do something when I know I can and have proven many people wrong. Don’t even bother wasting the energy telling people your goals unless you know they are supportive. Although sometimes you kind of have no choice

Here’s an example: I was waiting for an interview for a grad school program. They had students out in the lobby talking to us, answering our questions, telling us about the program etc. I would have to be moving to a different state and was a single mother. Keep in mind I had been planning this for years. I was told by one of the students (who herself just had a baby) that I wouldn’t be able to do the program without family support (for my daughter). Which I thought was pretty funny considering I had raised my daughter all by myself for 11 years at that point. Long story short I got accepted into the program and gasp actually did it all by myself like I had been all along. Graduated and now work in the field. It’s still irks me though, lol. She wasn’t the first and won’t be the last unfortunately

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