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TKCerbs t1_j9oxy80 wrote

5 kids at 33 wow. I’m 38 and still haven’t figured out if I want one..

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eloel- t1_j9pbd3t wrote

>5 kids at 31 wow

Not that 5 kids at 33 is that much less wow (5 kids of any sort is 5 too many), but it's 33.

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ExistentialDreadness t1_j9ozv4c wrote

Same. I mean, who really actually wants to bring a child into this mess?

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DukeVerde t1_j9q21y3 wrote

Its' called adoption, for those already in this mess.

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I_Got_Jimmies t1_j9pgc8b wrote

The trick is to completely ignore reality, replace that part of your brain with television or religion, and become very selfish. This all seems to be correlated pretty directly with number of children.

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Derpsauce1337 t1_j9qbqbi wrote

Ah yes the selfishness of.. not wanting to bring someone into poverty when there is no clear way out?

Not wanting to bring someone into the world who is completely dependent on me when I already struggle with mental health and absolutely cannot take care of them to the degree I would want to?

yes, selfish

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I_Got_Jimmies t1_j9qcxze wrote

You’re….. agreeing with me.

What’s highly correlated with religious fundamentalism? Catholics aren’t known for their tiny single child families.

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Derpsauce1337 t1_j9qdb9o wrote

Ah yes I see now, I thought you were going the other way with it, but the religion should have clued me in more

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Derpsauce1337 t1_j9qdck0 wrote

Ah yes I see now, I thought you were going the other way with it, but the religion should have clued me in more

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discattho t1_j9qcsmd wrote

pretty sure he's saying that people who ignore those mainstream issues and don't care about other people, including their own offspring, are the ones who have a lot of kids.

I don't agree, but that was his point.

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Derpsauce1337 t1_j9qd5q6 wrote

Ah I can definitely see that now, thanks for clarifying!

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[deleted] t1_j9pysrk wrote

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I_Got_Jimmies t1_j9qd6uv wrote

Glad we have kind hearted people like you to put people like me in their place.

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[deleted] t1_j9qejjv wrote

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DuskyDay t1_j9qg2yb wrote

They are, in fact, selfish.

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[deleted] t1_j9qgyxl wrote

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losprimera t1_j9r3kgp wrote

wait, youre saying that people have kids explicitly to prop up the economy?

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[deleted] t1_j9r6k7d wrote

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losprimera t1_j9rag8w wrote

i do. im just clarifying if its explicit. That means im asking if ppl have children with the intent to prop up the economy.

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[deleted] t1_j9rbwat wrote

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losprimera t1_j9snr7n wrote

well, u were arguing witht the other dude about motives. he argued that havin kids was selfish. It was a surprisingly nuanced answer, because there are, afaik, two possible claims here. Either its A) the desire for conception is selfish (especially if its an instinctual desire), or B) the outcome is undesirable (e.g. an insecure future for the child). Ofc, you brought in a completely different argument that it props up an economy and failed to address the above two claims directly, but the curious thing is that selfishness and self-serving principles are very much part of the incentives of a free economy, so really there isnt a point of contention between you and him. thats why I wanted to clarify and see if you were aware that you had been arguing a strawman.

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TwistedMetalGear t1_j9s5aqu wrote

What you explain is a nice benefit of continuing the human race, but nobody really thinks "hmm, I'm worried about the future state of the economy, therefore I'm gonna have kids to prop it up."

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DuskyDay t1_j9qkjh3 wrote

> So everyone with kids is selfish? Doesn’t matter that those kids will literally run the economy and society and make sure the infrastructure is there to support you when you’re old?

The problem is that there are too many kids. Only some of them would be necessary.

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[deleted] t1_j9qlt89 wrote

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DuskyDay t1_j9quejn wrote

It doesn't matter which ones. There should be much less of them. I don't see why is this simple point so complicated for you.

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I_Got_Jimmies t1_j9qgc3p wrote

Oh Lordy, thank ya for settin me a-straight. I see the light! Oh how I’ve wronged! Shower me with forgiveness and I shall neva err agin!

Also when you put quotes around something, that usually means it’s to indicate a quote. As in, something that was previously said or written. Not a paraphrasing. But yknow, we’re all learning!

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[deleted] t1_j9qi6e2 wrote

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I_Got_Jimmies t1_j9ql4ra wrote

I’ll be in good company! Thanks friend!

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[deleted] t1_j9qm2jl wrote

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I_Got_Jimmies t1_j9qnfwe wrote

I hope you’re raising your kids with a better attitude than you have.

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[deleted] t1_j9qoham wrote

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I_Got_Jimmies t1_j9qp45t wrote

Ok I’ll speak your language then.

🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂😂😂😂🤣🤣😂🤣🤣😂😂😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣🤣😂🤣🤣😂🤣😂😂

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Bath t1_j9qlfgf wrote

My thoughts exactly, I'd have kids in an ideal world but not in this world

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capresesalad1985 t1_j9p5h9x wrote

Omg I’m turning 38 in a month and I feel the pressure to make a decision. I just got married last year and we know we want them, but I wish I had another 5 years to “grow up”

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codq t1_j9qipl3 wrote

Do it now, in five years, you’ll be five years older.

Trust me, you don’t want to be wrangling a toddler when you’re old—and you’ll never be younger than you are right now.

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JustADutchRudder t1_j9r4ca4 wrote

Or, do it 10 years from now and rent out your basement to a young couple for free nanny work.

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Fool_Apprentice t1_j9qvgvc wrote

I'll make this easy for you. You will regret it either way.

That said, you'll love your kids even if it was a stupid decision (and it is, it always is). If you don't have kids, then you will spend your time wondering what might have been because you will be too idealistic to realize that you made the right choice and you'll go to your grave sad.

My advice is make the wrong choice and have kids. You will regret it.

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Sucks_to_be_u24 t1_j9r4lh2 wrote

Umm that’s pretty broad generalizations of childfree people(we don’t all sit there with regret growing older ) . Having kids is not for everyone but I agree everyone who wants kids should definitely do it when they’re little younger .

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QuantumHope t1_j9rq749 wrote

Plus it isn’t always a choice. Infertility is real.

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capresesalad1985 t1_j9r6xhy wrote

I fully appreciate this. Your right that either choice you make…you can’t help but wonder what the other path would have held.

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Buddha473ml t1_j9r86jb wrote

The grass is always greener on the other side.

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FarginSneakyBastage t1_j9rw945 wrote

You just have to remind yourself that you're living the life of the you that didn't make your choices, and they're really envious of you.

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BalotellisMoustache t1_j9ri9pc wrote

I love this because it really summarizes how I feel about it even though I'm in the dumb idealistic age lol. When I finished undergrad in my early 20s I was like damn, do I want to work really hard on developing my career (which in my field of interest would include significant international travel) and end up being an old dad, or do I want to set limits on how much stress I want now and find more manageable albeit less rewarding career paths in order to focus on becoming a father. I feel like in my relationship that starting a family will be expected much sooner than my late 30s, maybe even late 20s and honestly it feels like the right choice. I think it's going to make life so much harder but I think we'll be okay and it will be worth it in the long run. I sometimes feel the pressure to not have kids or to wait but it just feels like such an integral part of who we want to be (without kids we both feel like we'd be wondering as you said) that if anything I feel like we can grow more out of it than get drained by it overall, especially the younger we decide to do it.

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Nero_PR t1_j9qan6b wrote

28, probably won't have one any time soon.

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squirlz333 t1_j9rlv1s wrote

Plot twist he actually had 6 kids at that age, but one wanted to be a youtuber.

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superx89 t1_j9sclnu wrote

You’re missing out!

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TKCerbs t1_j9sfq4p wrote

We’ve been trying for almost a year, it might be too late.

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Zeptojoules t1_j9t0xu3 wrote

Just do it! What's the worst that could happen shrugs

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