Mr_Chiddy t1_j0hbxz7 wrote on December 16, 2022 at 5:19 PM

Hey Dr Maddox! Thank you for doing this AMA :) this is going to be a little personal, and trigger warning for those with trauma.

I've had a lot of experience recently with my partner going through multiple UK NHS services for their undiagnosed chronic pain and severe PTSD from childhood trauma they're still working through. They find the physical pain can lead to suicidal thoughts.

Each time they're suffering and a doctor speaks to them, my partner is extremely adverse to being honest about their suicidal thoughts as it leads to them being put in mental institutions that they feel have been unsafe and triggering while their physical condition goes untreated. As their partner and carer, I can understand their incredible reluctance to continue engaging with professionals who can help them, as my partner feels they do not truly understand or listen to their troubles.

My question is this; what can be done and what changes need to be put in place to overcome this block between doctor and patient, and what can we as individuals do who have suffered what we feel is a lack of compassionate care in the system?

UniversityofBath OP t1_j0yj25u wrote on December 20, 2022 at 10:39 AM

Hi!

Firstly I am really sorry, that your partner had these experiences and that you have both had to manage difficulties with the healthcare systems in response.

I think there is no easy answer to this one, and unfortunately the risk assessment questions which are needed from a clinical point of view can feel like they get in the way sometimes. They are the best tool we have and it's important to try to assess risk but they're not a very good one.

In terms of what can be done in response to a lack of compassion - I think it depends on your level of energy partly. You could write to an individual clinician to give feedback, or it's always possible to complain - in the UK the Patient Advisory and Liaison Service is independent and can manage complaints about the service you have been involved with. Making a complaint means it gets put on record and the clinicians involved will get that feedback, which hopefully will help improve the service. However it depends on whether you feel that this would be helpful for you as well - if you feel like you have the time and inclination to put a complaint together. I'm not saying this to put you off at all - just to acknowledge that this can sometimes feel like an extra burden.

Whatever you decide, I really hope you find some support which is helpful for both your partner and you.