Submitted by Other-Anybody-6686 t3_z5ltbl in LifeProTips
For my college, I've come to a really far away city from my hometown. My dad just left after setting me up in this apartment (i am living with 2 other roommates). idk, i feel empty as of now and literally has no idea what i should do next. Some tips from y'all guys might help me. Thanks, much appreciate it.
Socialize with your roommates.
Drink beer.
Take a walk outside to explore your new environment.
A combination of the above would be the best. Optional: disconnect.
don't forget about the poop knife
Whether you are male or female, don't be stupid and careless with the opportunity you have.
Explore, make friends, seek out interesting places to visit. Get to know your college campus and library.
Enjoy your new freedom.
Good luck!
Highly recommend the book "Where's Mom Now That I Need Her?". Has tips on stocking a pantry, recipes, bicycle repair, mending clothes, and more.
I hated scrubbing that week old oatmeal plate.
We are on remote for about 2 years now and honestly, no memory in my life is as nice as the time I spent with my friends celebrating their birthday or something. Just know your limits on alcohol and don't fall for the peer pressure, unless you wanna puke your guts out.
There will be that one time you massively fuck up and spill something on your clothes that you go to class in while not having spares. Or just generally wash your socks. I used to hang a shirt on a clothesline to block the lamp so I can sleep without getting my eyes burned out while my roommate needed light.
Christmas lights, charging cables, headphones and other stuff often fail at the connectors or stressed solder joints. It's the basic stuff that saves you money and time buying replacements or finding someone to repair it for you.
Often when sharing with random people in college there's one person that does fuck all around the house because they still think they live at home. Don't be that person.
Learn how to cook, especially cheap cuts of meat. If you can make a pot roast you can make friends. Lots of college kids miss home cooked meals. If you invite people for an actual dinner they’ll be thrilled.
Also throw in with your roommates for a BJs or Costco or other big box membership. $25 right now and you can make the money back on paper products alone. Just get a single, they do not care if you look like the picture.
Sound cancelling headphones are your best friend, that and ear plugs. If people want to stay up late and you don’t, it’s better to cancel them out than create hostility.
The tip is… what you are feeling is normal. Try to be open minded and meet new people. Go for walks around your town and explore. Give it time… it takes time to settle in and find your tribe.
These are all both dos and don't depending on your situation and mood lol
These are all both dos and don't depending on your situation and mood lol
Thanks, needed that a lot
Get to know and create a diverse group of friends. If you didn't have a group of diverse friends back home it'll open your eyes a bit.
That's what I've planned to do so. Hopefully I don't get distracted
The professors often do care. They give the benefit of the doubt to students who show up every day and often are strict with ones who regularly don't show up.
When it comes to asking for an extension or whether or not your grade might get rounded up it absolutely matters if they saw your face every class.
Wash your sheets and kitchen towels more often than you think you need to. Figure out a couple basic meals that you can make from pantry staples and keep those on hand. Get to know lots of different people from a variety of backgrounds,she's, etc. Explore the new city away from the university area.
Since you are in college, check out some of the different social events, especially for other cultures. Pick a couple that seem like something you'd be interested, and a couple that are completely new to you. Try new things.
Had fun going to a Indian dinner event with a classmate.
Yes... My biggest regret is my 8am Monday class, followed by a two hour break, then the second class. I missed it so much I failed the class (Calculus).
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Its a shock being on your own so suddenly. I went thru some depression. Its going to be ok. Follow the structure of your classes and studying. Then fill the other time with what comes along. Good luck!!
Make friends
Be with people. Being alone is not good if you haven’t been alone a lot before.
Drinking isn’t necessary
Buy a plunger before you need one.
take advantage of every service your college offers. career counseling, tutoring, clubs and other student organizations, and if there is cheap/free therapy or other mental health services please take full advantage. Explore every nook and cranny of your campus, many universities have delightfully weird things crammed in out of the way places.
yesh, thanks
First one is so real lol
Go to class
Pay attention
Do the work
Fair enough
If you do those three things, you have >95% chance of success.
Figure out if are an introvert, who needs quiet time to re-energize, or an extrovert who needs socializing. Build that into your day as something you need, just like food and water and sleep. Figure out your optimal time of day for learning, and protect it for studying. Meet with academic counselor early and every year, so you don't lose track of your graduation target date. If you don't know your major they can be very helpful to guide you in figuring it out. I went to a couple of department welcome celebrations/ campus club parties and met some great people in other majors, which led to a part time job later on. Every time I moved to a new city and knew no one, I noticed that 6 weeks in I would get depressed. I would pull back, stay home, read, watch tv for a bit, then pick myself up and start doing things. So now I know to expect it, recognize the pattern, and understand it is my necessary step before I move forward. Be gentle with yourself and it's ok to take some time to get comfortable. And you will meet lots of people who are very different from you. If you can be tolerant and open minded you will learn a lot about people and yourself. Always protect your safety first, as some people will take advantage or will not be graduating some day and you don't want to be one of them.
Go to Goodwill, Salvation Army or second hand store for cooking pots and pans, utensils and inexpensive works of art-paintings of fruit for example. Just to give it a lived-in feel and not sterile. Good luck.
Set rules and boundaries from day one!
Everyone cleans the apartment, bathroom, kitchen, etc, 2-3 times per week. Make a roster if you have to.
Every one does dishes, no excuses!
After 9pm, no loud sounds of any kind, unless three of you are watching a movie together. Otherwise, put on headphones.
There was one night, 2 of my roommates decided two fuck random girls at 2am and the girls were loud! Not going to lie, I was a bit jealous at the time, but my sleep was more important. So establish ground rules for guys staying over.
If you notice one of your roommates has a habit of leaving a dirty plate on a coffee table, point it out and nip it in the butt asap.
Do: get a credit card with good rewards, cash back or points for a grocery store or something. Not just for travel points. Use it for every purchase.
Don't: spend more money on said credit card than you have in your account/budget for that month.
You'll build up credit, earn points to get free essentials and learn good budgeting and money tracking skills.
Maybe doesn't apply to the "far away from home" portion as much as just in general, but it'll be beneficial in the long run.
Also: I moved away too when I went to college, try and talk to people in your classes or elsewhere and don't judge people by their looks. Some of the best, longest lasting friendships I have from college are the people that I initially thought were "weird or not my type of friend". I was able to be myself, they were themselves and we became fast and good friends.
Edit: typo x2
Don't drink the Kool-Aid, figuratively and literally. My parents would never let me have it growing up because it was too much sugar. I binge drank it and got my first cavity within 12 months.
I did this.
Getting a rice cooker makes cheap meals very simple.
This is a great time to start a new routine, reshape who you are. Go to the gym, etc.
Socializing is far more important than most people think. Make friends and say yes to every social opportunity. Train yourself to be extroverted.
It’s easiest to concentrate in class and learn the material that way. Much more difficult to teach it to yourself when you miss class.
Get a calendar and when you get the syllabus for each class, go through them all and write on the calendar when exams are and when papers and other assignments are due. Look at it often.
For every beer/wine/whatever alcohol you drink you consume, drink an equal amount of water - you will be able to have fun till the very end of the party and will not have as terrible of a headache the next day. Also make a habit of having some staples available for a quick meal at all times - some rice, salad and canned tuna will make a quick lunch and you will build a habit of not relying on takeouts all the time.
And don’t forget to have fun! It might feel a bit overwhelming at the moment, but a lot of people around you will be feeling the same way - it will all work out :)
As a former grad that went to college 900 miles away from home seeing this makes me feel obligated to try and share what I can.
Don’ts
Do’s
Hope that some of this might be of help. Best of luck to you
It is even more tempting when the lectures get recorded an you receive the recording afterwards
Thanks man, I went shopping today and got some basic essentials, tomorrow I'll go look for appropriate clubs. And yes, I'll definitely do my best not to miss any class.
There are a lot of new students in the same situation as you. Most of them will be very open because they also want to get to know people.
Meet as many people as you can initially. The number you hang with will reduce, and you’ll actually likely keep those connections for decades.
Same for class. Look for people who are turning up and paying attention (and not fucking about). Hang with them, because group learning is way more efficient, and you may get split into groups for projects.
Go to class. Go to the library. Go to on campus events and make friends. Staying in your room all day really takes a toll on your mental health. Also set a schedule of when to study/have fun. No one will force you to do anything so make it a habit of creating a schedule.
Look up money saving tips. There are hundreds of threads for this.
Do your dishes while you wait for food to cook, then wash your dish right after. It's a big time saver.
When you party, don't feel pressured to get drunk quickly to catch up. Student party's tend to last until like 10pm because nobody can pace themselves and will get wasted.
Going out to bars is a massive expense, house party's are cheaper. But you pay for it in cleaning and damages. So party at your friends instead.
It makes life x10 times better if you get along with your room mates. But you don't have to be best friends if you don't click.
Being on bad terms with them leads to a toxic existence, since you are around them all the time.
Don't lend money with the expectation you will get it back. Ever. It will strain any relationship you have.
Wear a condom every time.
Have fun! It can be a really fun time, you will meet some cool people.
Keep anything valuable in your room.
Go to class.
The sheets top is good. Now that you are older you will notice you are sweaty and stinkier. Once a week or two weeks max is good
Save on BJs by just sucking your homies off yourself. The boys love it and it's not gay, it's frugal. Just say no homo.
Totally agree with this. I had experienced it myself. Showing up to the class regularly and attending the extra AMA sessions by the professor himself helped him recognize me and later he changed my 'F' to a 'B+'. (Long story behind getting an 'F' so didn't get into that here)
Visit the party house. Do not live in the party house.
Always trust your instincts. If a situation feels odd or sketchy it's ok to leave. Chances are others feel the same. Situational awareness.
Start a new routine.
Develope good study habits now and stick to them
Eat healthy food
Get enough sleep
This. + Meal prepping while you're at it, always having a home cooked meal ready to go is invaluable and the time save of having to only cook once or twice a week is so so good once u make a habit of it
Don't get addicted to hookers and cocaine.
Buy toilet paper in bulk when it’s on sale.
Be careful with credit cards.
Don't only stay in touch with your friends in your hometown, but also socialize in your new city.
Get into a good routine. Try to get outside everyday. Eat healthy.
And you can call or text your mom any time if you're lonely or bored. Moms love that shit.
The choices you make will follow you. It isn't just the choices but your actions that will turn into habits. Work hard, that habit will help you more than anything else.
Those three skills will serve you well at work, too! Show up, pay attention, do the work.
Learn to care for yourself. Your emotions will feel easier to handle when you're well fed, well rested, hydrated, sober, and you've had some exercise lately.
Prioritize sleep. That means using your time wisely so you're not studying all night.
Sure, go out and party sometimes, but not all the time. Just because you can recover from a hangover in like 20 minutes doesn't mean you should make a habit of it
Eat vegetables. And fruit. And protein. Get protein and produce in every meal.
When your body feels good, your mind will feel better than it would if your body felt like crap.
Especially the gym. I can’t believe I didn’t exercise more in college (44 now). It was a free world class facility and I never stepped foot in there.
Buy condons and keep one in the wallet, you don’t want to have a child now.
Bold of you to assume that i got any rizz 😔 thanks tho
Reminds me of my time… 15+ years ago. It’s natural to feel lonely and overwhelmed. But also remember there will be so many nice memories form this time that you will look back on.
Here is what I would advise you ( and my younger self):
Attend classes and don’t slip on discipline. No one will push you, which is great but you also have bigger responsibility to manage yourself.
Make friends. You will realise later in life that some of the best friendships happen in college. So do go out and make best use of the social scene.
Join college clubs/sports societies etc. It will hone your professional skills that will be invaluable for your career.
There will be days when you will feel depressed and homesick. All of this will forge the future you.
I wish you the best of luck!
Do: Cocaine.
Don't do: Cocaine.
Do NOT sign up for those credit cards they'll offer you, usually some booth set up outside the bookstore or whatever.
Keep up your personal hygiene. Keep your body, your clothes, and your sheets (reasonably) clean.
Dress nicer, the world will treat you with more respect.
Don't take pills unless directly from your doctor. There will be a lot of people experimenting with drugs around you. There is a lot of counterfeit pills in the market (from the Mexican drug cartels) that contain fentanyl. One pill can kill.
if there is a student union/gathering place for students or a campus message forum use them often, especially if you are introverted. they are a way to introduce yourself to new people, perspectives, and interests outside of class. it's time for a really exciting adventure.
Plan fun things do you have something to look forward to
To get over this temporary feeling of transition:
Call a loved one and ask how they are doing.
Write a letter.
Read a favorite book again or watch the tv show that always makes you smile.
Be kind to someone there; they may be feeling the same.
In a few days, you won't even remember this.
You got this.
I think they meant "don't care" as in they won't nag you to show up to class like teachers in middle school, let's say, would. So there is no one to scold you for not attending classes.
Cook healthy meals and maintain your space tidy.
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