Genuine self-confidence and self-esteem is earned.

For example, let’s say your statement was “I feel really bad that I suck at basketball” while knowing you did not put in the work to be good at basketball. What’s the solution? Practice and study the game of basketball until it is undeniable that you’re good at it. You will have genuine self-confidence and self-esteem in the area of basketball. This same concept applies to EVERYTHING.

If you feel bad about yourself, it is probably well deserved. The trick is perspective.

“This is who I am. I deserve to be miserable. I’ll never be good enough, etc”(a losers way of thinking)

“This is what I did. It’s done. This is who I am RIGHT now. I accept that. This is who I want to be. I’m going to be that. This is who I hurt. I’m going to try my best to correct that. What I can’t fix, I will let go, but I hope the best for everyone”(Winners way of thinking)

This way if thinking was indoctrinated in me throughout my entire childhood of competing in sports and watching inspiring media. I will assume that you will need to have a constant self-awareness and obsession with changing your way of thinking from a ‘losers’ way of thinking to a ‘winners’ way of thinking. You seem to feel deeply about this topic, which is beautiful and I think if you grind out a good way of thinking, you’ll do great.

Cheer up

Edit: Oh, and the most important advice I can give is to never give up. Make this an absolute rule, a principle, part of your identity, whatever you want to label it, that no matter what, you’re going to try again every single time you fall.