This is the kind of thing you can only believe if you were raised in a happy functional emotionally stable family.

I was terrified my girlfriend would believe this, when she saw me scream at the top of my lungs at my BPD mother who was prying into our relationship attempting to find weak points. I had to put up that performative rage to try and set some boundaries she would respect in a language that would shock her out of her jealousy at not being the center of attention. I needed to posture this way before she poisoned me and my GF's relationship like my mother has poisoned every relationship with every friend and coworker and family member she's ever had. She's got a twin sister and they've been in a no-contact status on and off dozens of times now.

Abusive, emotionally manipulative parents have installed certain triggers, shortcuts, and routines in their parent-child relationship over the years that a partner probably has no understanding of. Seeing something like the onramp to an entitled tantrum, tears, and forced appeal for sympathy coming a mile off, requires either sitting through that episode with the partner, or taking off, dropping some F-bombs, and cratering the road from altitude.

Some of us have to structure a lot of our behavior around remaining emotionally intact and never adopting the relationship dynamics of our parents. That doesn't mean it's possible to treat them like we treat everyone else. Doing that would have required becoming estranged many times over.