Hey Rev,

Well, this was just delightful in a horrifying kind of way. Kind of impressive actually.

> The peppermint sticks, Burt was dismayed to find, were so coated in dust that they looked pink and grey.

Like, why? Just why? I loved this description here but not so much the mental image it gave me. These are all great things but the way. I loved the portrayal of Burt here, his suspiciousness, his careful manoeuvring and then his reaction at eh end.

I do just have a few bits and bobs for you,

> Burt stood by the grimy soda fountain, which rained rust on him if he brushed it,

The last bit of this sentence read a bit weird to me. I feel like just saying it was a rusty fountain may read better? But that might just be me.

> He pulled out a shirttail and gave them a swipe, removing at least a year or two of dust, and set them on the counter.

I think mentioning the colour change could help here. What was the colour with the dust on and how did it change after the wipe? Something like that could help.

I hope this helps.

Good Words!