It was mid morning as the director came into the office. "Here's your coffee sir" said an intern holding out a Starbucks cup leaning forward almost in a half bow. Director Clement took the cup from him without a word and took a sip. "This has almond milk, I thought I told you nitwits I preferred coconut milk." "I am so sorry" said the, for all intents and purposes, nameless intern. The director brushed past him without another word coffee in hand and went into his office. He sat in his luxurious cushioned leather chair and looked at the small folder that read "TOP SECRET". He opened it; inside there was a small stack of messages. The first one read "I believe the mission is done. I followed the mark for a couple days to see his usual routine and on his way to work I stuck him with a cyanide coated pin on the end of an umbrella. I got the idea from some documentary a watched a while back, those crazy soviets were always doin wild stuff." The director grimaced and picked up the next note. "Alright turns out this cat is still showing up for work so I guess I gotta just stick to the basics. Every day he stops by a Starbucks and they just so happen to have a help wanted sign. I applied to the job and got it, all I gotta do is spike his coffee after Kevin here shows me the ropes." The director sighs and picked up the next message. "Alright alright this man is an unstoppable force of nature, I suppose I gotta step up violence. I've planted a nice little surprise in the garbage bins near his apartment. Kevin's a nice lad I think you'd like him. He's been showing me how to make little leafs on the coffee." The director frowned as he saw yet another message in the file. "I shit you not on this, he was right next to the explosion, and all he did was lost his clothes. While the man was certainly above average, I was thinking with how tough he was he'd have to coil it up in a jockstrap like one of them bubble gum tapes. I've still been giving him the spiked coffees, today I put a four leaf clover in it hoping for some better luck. This has been real stressful, Kevin says there's a lot of tension in my shoulders." The director took a large breath in and pinched the bridge of his nose as he looked at the last message in the file. "Y'know boss I think I'ma just stay working at this joint with Kevin and that this has been a message from God. I showed my mom a picture of the four leaf clover I put in his coffee today, she said she was proud of me and she was happy I turned my life around. Sorry about your coffee but you were the only person who knew my identity :/" the directors stomach churned.