I'm nearly 50 myself. In my 20's and early 30's for some reason I had this fear that if I wasn't putting myself out there, socializing, being with people that I was wasting my time, or my youth. Obviously, in hindsight, that was an irrational fear based on nothing but my own (usually low) self esteem. Eventually, I met the right woman, now my wife, and realized how stupid that thinking was and am now perfectly comfortable with myself and the things I want to do... namely being a voracious reader. It was just a folly of youth, that's all.