Submitted by AutoModerator t3_y5vw8u in listentothis
MannyGrey t1_itnetqg wrote
Reply to comment by WhiskeyEyesKP in Music Melting Pot [Week of October 17, 2022] by AutoModerator
The intro was cool, i really enjoyed the female vocalist. Her voice has pop-punk qualities for sure. I liked the lyrics, but i felt like most lines had one more word than they needed. It missed the pocket by an inch and took away from the feel for me. For example
"I don't want to hurt you and i don't want to stop this long lasting friendship.
But I'm bad at keeping secrets and i feel i should say this.
I just might like you." could have been
"I don't want to hurt you [, ] i don't want to stop this, long lasting friendship.
[]I'm bad at keeping secrets,[] i feel i should say this.
I just might like you."
Those little conjunctional absences make each line even more powerful, memorable, and even give your vocalist more time to breath when performing live which helps with stamina. This same problem persists though most of the song but is more evident in the male vocalists section. Other than that, I enjoyed the song, its well mixed, and think you guys have something cool here. Nice job.
I produce hip-hop, so if you're into that, here's me taking back my power from a harsh life.
Viewing a single comment thread. View all comments